Alchemy and Saiyans
by it walks alone
Summary: Ed wakes up and finds himself in the DBZ world. As far as I know, it's the second DBZFMA Xover.
1. Meeting and Introductions

Summary: A mysterious stranger takes Edward Elric and deposits him in the DBZ world.

Disclaimer: Do you actually think I could own either DBZ or FMA? Didn't think so. _sobs_

"Speaking" _Thoughts _(Me to you)

**Chapter 1: Meeting and Introductions**

_Oh, my aching head..._ Ed thought. _Where the hell am I?_ He groaned.

"Mom! I think he's waking up!" a loud voice called out right by his ear. He winced.

"Trunks! Don't yell! I'm right here!" a woman said, not as shrill or loud as the first one. Ed relaxed a smidgen.

Ed, getting curious, tried opening his eyes. He squinted against the harsh artificial lighting.

"Where am I?"

"Poor boy. You're in Capsule Corporation. Trunks found you passed out in the street outside and brought you in. I'm Bulma Briefs."

"Edward Elric. Capsule Corporation?"

Both Bulma and Trunks stared at him, open mouthed. "You've never heard of Capsule Corporation?"

"No. Where am I? City, country, region...?"

Trunks was still staring at him, one phrase repeating over and over in his head—_...Never heard of Capsule Corp..._

"You're in Capsule Corp, in West City."

Ed was now thoroughly confused. He sat up, grimacing slightly. "Can I see a map?"

"Sure!" Bulma said, nodding. "Trunks, go get a map for him."

"What kind of map?"

"World, if you've got one."

"Sure," the chibi chirped, then ran out the door.

"Why a world map?" asked Bulma.

"I don't think I'm even remotely near where I came from."

"Ohh."

Just then, Trunks ran back in carrying a roll that was longer than he was tall.

"Thanks, kid."

Ed unrolled the map and stared in complete bafflement. Bulma peered over his shoulder.

"What's wrong?"

"I... I don't think I'm even in my own world anymore..."

000000000000000000000000000000

Bulma had called the entire Z-Senshi to Capsule Corp as soon as she had left. The only one she was having trouble with now was Vegeta. Ed was with her and Trunks was with the others.

"VEGETA! You get down here this instant! I don't care if this is interfering with your training!" she screamed, pulling out her Frying Pan of Terror.

Ed winced. _She reminds me of Winry..._ he thought. "Hey, Bulma," he said, stepping forward, "why can't I try?"

Bulma turned to him, a worried expression on her face. "But..."

Ed shook his head. "Let me try. You go back to the others."

Bulma nodded. "Okay, but if you're not there in fifteen minutes, I'm coming to get you."

Ed nodded. "Fair enough."

Bulma nodded and turned to Vegeta. "And if I find you hurt in any way..." she growled, brandishing her Frying Pan of Terror. Then she turned and walked out.

_Definitely reminds me of Winry._

Vegeta landed, glaring at Ed, who looked slightly affronted.

"What? Did I do something wrong?" he asked. Then he remembered how the other man had acted toward his own wife, and shook his head.

"Never mind. Anyway, shouldn't you be at least a little curious about me?" Vegeta merely continued glaring. "I mean, I think I'm in another universe entirely..."

This snared Vegeta's attention, which had been wandering slightly (Bad attention! Get back here!) quite forcefully.

"What?"

Ed looked up, surprised that the flame-haired man had deigned to speak to him. Then he smirked.

"If you want to find out, come on. I'll tell everyone at once."

Vegeta's glare intensified, but he abruptly turned to the door, already striding out, leaving Ed to scramble to keep up.

000000000000000000000000000000

10 minutes later, Bulma was getting increasingly worried.

Suddenly, the door slammed open and Vegeta stalked in, followed by a bemused short blond kid in a red overcoat. (Ed: Why you! STOP CALLING ME SHORT!)

Bulma's mouth fell open. "H-how... He wouldn't even listen to me!"

The kid smirked. "Just said something he actually got interested in."

"Oh."

"So explain, brat. Y—" Vegeta began, but was cut off as the new kid's eyes flashed murderously.

"Are you calling me short?" he said, almost yelling.

Vegeta blinked. This was unexpected. "No..."

"Oh. Okay then. Go on."

By now, everyone was staring at him. He finally noticed.

"What? Is there something on my face?"

Gohan recovered first. "Sorry. No, there isn't. But how about we introduce ourselves? I'm Gohan Son, this is my mom Chi-Chi, and my little brother Goten."

"Krillen Chestnut, my wife Eighteen, and my daughter Marron."

"Whoa, whoa. Your name is a number?"

"Yes. I'm an android. Well, cyborg, technically."

"I see."

"I'm Tien, and this is Chaozu." Chaozu waved.

"Bulma Briefs, my sun Trunks, and my husband Vegeta." Trunks waved excitedly, but Vegeta merely grunted.

The kid eyed him. "Not exactly a people person, is he?"

Yamcha laughed. "Now _there's_ an understatement. I, by the way, am Yamcha Bandit."

"I'm Master Roshi."

"Right. And I'm Edward Elric."


	2. Explanations

Summary: A mysterious stranger takes Edward Elric and deposits him in the DBZ world.

Disclaimer: Do you actually think I could own either DBZ or FMA? Didn't think so. sobs

A/N: As you can tell, I'm redoing the story. By a suggestion from a reviewer, I've changed it so that they don't all find out about his auto-mail in the very beginning. Anyway, Review Responses for the previous Chapter 2:

**Firehedgehog:** grins back

**Reality:** Continuing!

**miroku-has-darkness:** Finally, someone with constructive criticism! Nice!

**Suuki-Aldrea:** Hehe... About that 'soon' part...

**WildfireDreams:** Dunno if this is _soon_, but...

**Glitchhunter:** Okay, okay! This isn't technically the next chapter, but it's close enough, seeing as how I put most of chapter three into it.

Wow! 6 reviews for one chapter! A new record for me! Oh, by the way, I need some feedback here. Should I include my elementals? So far, I'm trying my hardest not to, but I can change that if you want...

"Speaking" _Thoughts _(Me to you)

Last time:

"Right. And I'm Edward Elric."

**Chapter 2: Explanations**

Vegeta glared at Ed. "So explain. You said you didn't think you were from this universe."

Every pair of eyes in the room snapped to Ed.

"Well, I don't really remember much... I was walking to the train station with my little brother Al when I heard a voice... It was unlike anything I've ever heard, kind of a chaotic mix of pretty much everything. It said, 'I'm feeling random today. How 'bout I kill you and claim I didn't? Or don't and say I did? I know! I'll send you to another universe! Have fun, and don't forget to kill all the rabbits you can find! There are just too many of the dang things...' And then everything went dark, I heard Al calling me, and then I blacked out." Ed shook his head. "When I woke up, I was here. Along with the map, that makes me think that voice was telling the truth. I think I am in another universe."

Yamcha shook his head as if trying to clear it. "Wait, a map? What about it?"

Ed looked at him, seriously. "I don't recognize anything on it. This whole world is completely unfamiliar to me."

Yamcha swallowed. "Oh."

"Where are you from?" asked Bulma.

"A country called Amestris."

She looked confused. "Never heard of it."

Ed nodded. "Just like I've never seen anything on that map before," he agreed.

"Maybe we should talk to Dende and Piccolo about this. I've noticed they aren't here," Gohan suggested, looking pointedly at Bulma. She scowled.

"I couldn't call them." Her eyes narrowed dangerously. "They need a phone..."

000000000000000000000000000000

Ed's eye twitched. _They're GREEN..._

"EDWARD!"

Ed jumped. "What the hell do you..." He paused seeing everyone staring at him strangely. "Sorry. Thought I was back home..." he said despondently, hanging his head.

"It's okay, Edward," said Bulma, smiling.

"So, what were you saying?"

"I was just trying to get your attention so I could introduce you. Edward, this is Dende, Guardian of Chikyuu, and Piccolo, the former guardian. Dende, Piccolo, this is Edward Elric."

Ed blinked. "Guardian of Chikyuu?" he asked, bewildered.

Dende nodded. "Yes. I am also called God."

Ed's jaw dropped as he stared at the green alien who wasn't that much taller than he was. "G-God? You mean God actually exists?"

"Yes. And he can be quite annoying, let me tell you," Gohan replied, glaring at the teenage Kami, who laughed.

"But you're just so fun to torture, Gohan! You know that!"

Ed stared, completely and utterly lost, between the two teens. "Uhh... guys?" he interjected weakly.

Dende finally noticed him again. "Oh, sorry Edward."

"Ed is fine."

Dende nodded. "Alright Ed. Do you know who sent you here?"

Ed shook his head. "No. But I'd definitely recognize that odd voice anywhere," he replied.

"I see."

"Hey, couldn't Shenlong tell us who or what brought him here?" interjected Krillen excitedly.

The Kami shook his head. "No. He couldn't tell us exactly, because whatever it was works in another universe."

"But generally—like what sort of being could do this?"

Dende considered this. "Perhaps, but the way I see it, there is only one choice: a god."

Ed stared. "A god? Well, obviously this god doesn't like me," he said, his customary scowl settling across his face.

Gohan glanced at him, but said nothing about ti. Instead, he posed a very important question: "Where should Ed stay? I mean, he obviously doesn't have a place of his own, not being of this universe, but he probably doesn't have any money either."

Ed blushed a bit and ducked his head.

"He can stay with us! It's not like we don't have the room," said Bulma. Vegeta glared at her.

"That brat (Ed bristled) will _not_ be staying with us, onna," he growled.

Bulma seemed to ignore him, turning to Ed. "Do you want to stay with us?" she asked him.

Ed shrugged. "I don't see why not. I don't have anywhere else to go."

Bulma smiled.

"Onna!"

Bulma turned to Vegeta, whipping out her Frying Pan of Terror. "He _will_ be staying with us, Vegeta. One more word on the contrary from you and I won't fix your GR for a week!" she yelled, brandishing her Frying Pan at the unfortunate Saiyan prince.

Ed shook his heat at them. _She really does remind me of Winry. Poor guy._

000000000000000000000000000000

When they got back to Capsule Corp, Bulma took it upon herself to get Ed acquainted with the maze that was the residential wing. Needless to say, he was officially lost within five minutes. Bulma, noticing this, sighed and led him to a computer terminal.

"See this? It's a voice-activated computer terminal. These are all over Capsule Corp. If you wander around long enough, provided you aren't going in circles of course, you'll eventually run into one. Here, let me get you registered. Computer."

A chime sounded, followed by a female voice (think Star Trek) that said "Identify."

"Bulma Briefs."

There was another chime. "Voice scan accepted."

"Register guest," Bulma commanded.

"Name and voice print required."

Bulma turned to Ed, who had been watching the exchange with and expression of awe firmly planted on his face.

"Now, say your name. Don't tell me; talk to the computer."

Ed, mystified, nodded, turned to the terminal, and said "Edward Elric."

There was another chime of acknowledgment from the computer. "Guest registered. Length of stay?"

"Indefinite," Bulma supplied.

Another chime. "Registration complete."

Bulma nodded. She turned back to Ed. "Now, all you have to do if you get lost is find one of these and ask it how to get to wherever you want to go. Oh yeah, here," she added, fishing around in her pockets, then pulling out a pin and handing it to the bewildered teen, "This will let the computer track where you are so it can give you directions on the way. We all have something along these lines, so if you want to avoid someone, just tell the computer and ti will calculate a route around him or her. It can also tell you how to get to a person." Catching sight of the completely and utterly overwhelmed expression on the poor blond's face, she chuckled. "Too much technology? Don't worry about it—a lot of people feel that way when they first come here."

She led him down a few hallways, then indicated a door. "This is your room. It's already been entered into the computer, so you can get here easily."

Ed nodded gratefully. "Thanks."

"Now," Bulma said, looking down at her watch, "It's just about time to order dinner. How about we get you into the general area of the dining room so that you don't get lost before dinner?"

"Sure."

Bulma smiled at the bewildered blond and led him to the living room, where Trunks was watching TV.

"Trunks?" she called to her son.

"Yeah, Mom?" said chibi replied.

"could you please not led Ed get lost before or on the way to dinner? And _no pranks_," she added sternly.

The lavender-haired chibi pouted, but agreed.

"Good." Bulma nodded, then walked out, leaving the poor alchemist alone with the terrorizing chibi.

Luckily enough, said terror actually obeyed his mother for once.

000000000000000000000000000000

After dinner, during which Ed was thoroughly flabbergasted at how much Vegeta and Trunks could eat ("This is crazy! I mean, they eat more than I do!"), Ed wandered around Capsule Corp. until he'd found the library. He was floored (again... Seems to be happening to him a lot. Poor Ed.) at the sheer number of books that could be crammed into one room.

He wandered through the huge room, looking at the different sections, wondering how someone could be expected to reach books on what appeared to be the third floor (fly, of course!) and generally wondering if there was anything on alchemy in this place.

"Looking for anything in particular?"

Ed jumped. He hadn't know anyone else was here. "Not really. I was just wondering of there was anything in here on alchemy," said the young blond, turning to see who had addressed him. The young man he saw had short lavender hair, much like Trunks.

"Alchemy, huh?" Said young man's brow furrowed. "Hmm... I don't think there's much, but..." He walked over to a (to Ed) random shelf and pulled out a few books.

"These are the most relevant to alchemy. Any others here would be in this area," he said turning to Ed and handing the alchemist the books he'd pulled.

"Uhh... Thanks. By the way, who are you?" asked Ed.

"Trunks Briefs. I'm sure you've met the mini-me running around here," Trunks said smiling. "He hasn't played any pranks on you, has he?"

The blond shook his head. "No. Bulma told him not to."

"And he actually obeyed her?"

"Yeah. I'm Edward Elric, by the way."

Trunks smiled again. "Nice to meet you."

"What did you mean, 'mini-me'?" asked Ed after a moment.

"Oh, I'm from the future. The younger Trunks here is the past version of me."

"Oh." Ed's head was spinning.

After another moment of silence, Trunks spoke up again.

"Why alchemy?"

"H-huh?" Ed stuttered.

"Why'd you want books on alchemy? I mean, it's a pretty dead subject."

"I happen to be interested, that's all," Ed said, trying to hide his annoyance at hearing that alchemy was a 'dead subject'.

"Jeez, sorry. I didn't mean to offend you or anything." Trunks grinned. "Actually, I'm the reason the section on alchemy's as big as it is. I'm the only one here who's even remotely interested. I was just wondering why you were."

_Oh._ "Well, I've been using alchemy since I was really little, and I'm pretty good at it."

Trunks looked at the blond, impressed. "You're good? Then maybe you can help Mom fix the GR when Dad breaks it."

000000000000000000000000000000

Well, that's the end of the rewritten Chapter 2. Hope you liked it enough to send me a review!


	3. Living Arrangements

Summary: A mysterious stranger takes Edward Elric and deposits him in the DBZ world.

Disclaimer: Do you actually think I could own either DBZ or FMA? Didn't think so. (sobs)

A/N: I have found a beta and muse! She's BritKit, here. Oh, yeah, she told me to tell all of you very few readers not to expect her to ever update any of her stories again because won't let her log on. Anyway, this chapter is dedicated to her for getting me out of a very deep hole. And now, for Review Responses:

NONE! Yes, you read right; I received NO REVIEWS for the last chapter. (sniffs forlornly) Waah! Have I lost my audience completely?

"Speaking" _Thoughts _(Me to you)

Last time:

Trunks looked at the blond, impressed. "You're good? Then maybe you can help Mom fix the GR when Dad breaks it."

**Chapter 3: Living Arrangements**

Ed sweatdropped. "Uhh... sure I can! But... I do have a question..."

"What is it?"

"What's a 'GR'?"

Trunks sweatdropped. "Oh. Sorry. The GR's Dad's training room. It's short for Gravity Room."

"Oh. Cool! Could I see it?"

"Sure! ...If Dad's not training, which he probably is..." Trunks shook his head. "He practically lives in there."

"Oh. Well, if I'm going to be fixing it, I'll need to see the blueprints."

Mirai nodded. "Come on, I'll take you to Mom's lab so you can ask her."

000000000000000000000000000000

Mirai and Ed were standing outside a door in Capsule Corp. As usual, Ed had absolutely no clue where he was.

Mirai knocked on the door. "Mom, are you in there? It's Mirai Trunks and Ed!" he called.

A few moments later, Bulma opened the door and exclaimed over Trunks. "Mirai! When'd you get back? How are things going in your timeline? Have you defeated the androids yet?"

Mirai and Ed both sweatdropped. "Calm down, Mom! I got back about half an hour ago, noticed Ed in the library, and was talking to him. Yes, I killed the androids, and I've decided to stay here since you and Chi-Chi died..." he trailed off.

Bulma looked horrified. "Oh, I'm so sorry! Of course you can stay here! Now you have no one left in your time..."

"It's okay, Mom. Calm down. Anyway, I brought Ed. He says he might be able to help you fix the GR when Dad breaks it."

Bulma immediately stopped spazzing and turned to Ed, who she'd just noticed. "Sorry! I didn't notice you. Anyway, you can help me with the GR? How?" she asked.

"Well, I'm an alchemist."

"A what?"

Ed sighed. "I use alchemy to turn things into other things. Provided all the parts are still there and I've looked at the blueprints so I know what to put where, I can probably put the GR back together."

Bulma's eyes lit up. "Well, then, you'll just have to look at the blueprints! I can make copies so you can study them whenever you want to, as well. C'mon in!" she exclaimed, holding the door open for the two males.

"Y'know," Mirai whispered to Ed, "I don't think I've ever seen her this excited about anything before."

Ed blinked, but couldn't respond because Bulma had shut the door and was busy shifting through piles of blueprints on her workbench, muttering darkly.

"Ah! Here they are!" she cried as she resurfaced, holding up a set of blueprints triumphantly. She walked back over to Ed and handed them to him. "Now, do you want to see it while it's actually on?"

Ed looked up from the sheets of paper he held. "Uhh... Sure?" he replied. He turned his gaze back to the papers, his head whirling.

_Oh, jeez... Winry'd love to get her hands on this sort of technology! ...And it looks even more complicated than most transmutation circles!_

Soon, the threesome arrived at the GR and looked in through the window in the door. Vegeta was inside training, as usual. Ed looked to the side of the door and nearly choked.

_200 gees! Holy shit! No one could survive that! No human, anyway..._

0000000000000000000000000000000

Vegeta noticed them standing outside the door and scowled. _What does the onna want this time and why does she have that new brat and... What is he doing here?_

He stopped his training and glared at the door. Bulma smiled through the window and opened the door, deactivating the increased gravity.

Bulma stepped inside, the other two following her. She turned to the Saiyan. "Well, we've figured out something else about Ed. He can use alchemy, so he can help fix the GR when it breaks!" she said to Vegeta.

"Provided I can understand these damn things..." muttered Ed, glaring at the blueprints in his hands.

Vegeta, Bulma, and Mirai turned to him.

"Why?" asked Trunks.

Ed glanced up at him before turning back to the blueprints.

"Well, I have to know what goes where so I don't screw it up when I transmute it. Winry would so love to get her hands on this..." He added the last part under his breath, but Vegeta and Mirai heard it anyway.

"Who's Winry?" Mirai asked.

"Eh?" Ed looked up, startled. "Didn't realize I said that out loud..." Vegeta rolled his eyes. "Anyway, she's a mechanic, and a childhood friend of mine."

"A mechanic, huh? Hmm. I'd like to meet her," Bulma said thoughtfully. Vegeta rolled his eyes again.

"Well, if I can find a way to go back and forth between universes, you could meet her. I'm sure you two would get along."

"Alrighty, then! Ed, you can keep looking at the blueprints and you have my permission to examine the gravity generator in here, so long as you don't break anything, and Mirai and I are going to start working on a way to go between universes. C'mon, Mirai!"

"Oh, yeah! One more question!" Ed called after them.

"Yes, Ed?"

"Umm... Is there anyone I can spar with?"

"Why would you need to? Are you a martial artist?" Bulma asked, confused.

"Not really. But I need to keep in shape. There are so many people trying to kill me back home it's not even funny. And here, I can't spar with Al, so..."

"Well, I'm sure someone would be willing to spar with you, Ed. Tell you what, I'll call Yamcha for you. Come on."

000000000000000000000000000000

About half an hour later, Bulma was explaining the gravity generator to Ed. The blueprints were scattered all over the floor and Vegeta was off sulking somewhere because his mate ant the new brat had taken over the GR. He was, however, within earshot. At least, when Bulma screams.

Suddenly, the doorbell rang. "Ed, cover your ears." He obeyed. "VEGETA! Get the door!"

Ed winced. He was very grateful for the warning, but his ears still really hurt. _Damn, she's loud!_

They (Bulma, at least; Ed's ears were still ringing) could hear Vegeta grumbling and stalking off to open the door for the visitor. Bulma and Ed went back to working on the gravity generator.

After a minute of silence, the two of them (yes, Ed has recovered by this time) heard a sudden yell: "WHAT THE HELL ARE _YOU_ DOING HERE!"

Bulma and Ed looked up in unison. "Oops. That would be Yamcha. Shouldn't have had Vegeta get the door. Forgot he hates Yamcha."

She got up, Ed hastily following. They hurried to the front door, where they saw Vegeta getting ready to pound the poor Yamcha into the ground.

"Vegeta! Stop it! I asked him to come over!" Bulma yelled.

Vegeta halted mid-punch and turned to the blue-haired genius. "And why would you do that, onna?" he growled.

"Because Ed needs a sparring partner and you'd kill him. Now let Yamcha go."

Vegeta glared at her, but did as she said, seeing her hand inch toward wherever it is she keeps her Frying Pan of Terror and very wisely deciding not to incur her wrath. Yamcha ran and hid behind Bulma as soon as he could move again.

"So the brat can fight? This, I have to see."


	4. Secrets Kept and Secrets Learned

Summary: A mysterious stranger takes Edward Elric and deposits him in the DBZ world.

Disclaimer: Do you actually think I could own either DBZ or FMA? Didn't think so. /sobs/

A/N: Brit Kit still can't log on. Don't expect her to anytime soon. Anywho, yay! Seven reviews/sweatdrops/ Well, some of those were for the previous 4th chapter, which I'd posted on the wrong story. Anywho, Review Responses:

**WildfireDreams:** Thanks, and does that mean you like him?

**Suuki-Aldrea:** Well, he hasn't used his powers yet, but he has told them about them...

**miroku-has-darkness:** Well, a weakling compared to the rest of the Z-Senshi, but compared to a human with no formal training...

**WildfireDreams:** Yeah, I posted that on the wrong story (see above) /sweatdrops/

**Suuki-Aldrea:** Thank you for the moral support and I'll try.

**Vyrexuviel:** Sorry... HEY! You stole my word!

**Glitchhunter:** Yeah, that would be (see above) /sweatdrops-again/

"Speaking" _Thoughts _(Me to you) _"Telephone or other such communication device"_

Last time:

"So the brat can fight? This, I have to see."

**Chapter 4: Secrets Kept and Secrets Learned**

Ed's eyes narrowed. "Are you implying something?"

Vegeta Smirked™ at him, then stalked off to the GR.

When they got there, Bulma turned to Ed and said, "Have you ever trained in multiple gees?"

Ed shook his head. Yamcha sighed in relief.

"Then we don't need to turn the generator on," she continued happily.

Yamcha and Ed entered the GR and assumed fighting stances. Yamcha looked curiously at Ed. "Can you fly or use ki?" he asked the blond.

Insert blank stare from the alchemist. "Wha...?"

"I'll take that as a no."

000000000000000000000000000000

"I'll start, then." With that, Ed charged forward, aiming for a left punch, which Yamcha blocked. He then tried a right kick (he didn't know how strong Yamcha was, so he was avoiding using his auto-mail), which was also easily blocked.

Then Yamcha took the offense, and started a flurry of punches and kicks which were barely blocked or dodged.

000000000000000 VEGETA'S POV 000000000000000

Vegeta, watching outside, had noticed something very odd about the new brat. He was trying not to use his right armor left leg.

The Saiyan Prince scowled. The brat had secrets, and he was going to find out what they were.

000000000000000 YAMCHA'S POV 000000000000000

Yamcha was getting into this. Ed had been able to block most of his attacks, but the blond was starting to tire.

"Fist of the Wolf Fang Gale!" Yamcha yelled, and charged toward Ed with his trademark attack.

Ed managed to block many of the punches being thrown at him, but one got past his defenses—heading straight for his right shoulder.

000000000000000 NORMAL POV 000000000000000

There was a sickening thud of flesh on metal and a very loud, wet CRACK. Yamcha screamed in pain as blood spurted from his hand. Ed was merely thrown to the ground.

The alchemist looked up. "Oops. Maybe I should have warned him about that..."

Bulma sweatdropped.

"What the hell just happened?" growled Vegeta. He was confused, and that was one thing he absolutely hated to be.

"Well, he punched my right shoulder, hard enough that he didn't just bounce off and soft enough that it didn't break. I know this will probably sound callous, but I'm just grateful it wasn't me."

"You're right. It does," said Bulma.

Yamcha got over his pain enough to be utterly confused. "What... Why... What are you made of?" he gasped.

"Well, I'm mostly normal, but part steel."

"Explain once we've fixed Yamcha's hand. Come on, we've got some Senzu around here somewhere," Bulma quipped.

Ed got up and followed the other out of the GR. "Senzu? What are Senzu?"

"They're beans that can heal wounds and restore energy."

Ed looked up sharply. "Can it heal anything?"

"Pretty much. Anything in the way of injuries, anyway. It can't heal diseases."

Ed was getting excited. "Then maybe it could fix my arm!"

Yamcha looked back to where Ed was fallowing him, Bulma, and Vegeta. "Fix? Doesn't seem like it needs fixing, unless I somehow managed to break it as well as my hand."

Ed just glared at him.

Soon, they had reached another room. There were person-sized tanks along the walls. Bulma let Yamcha to one of the tables in the center of the room and started looking around. She pulled out a bag, took a bean out of it, and handed it to Yamcha, who ate it. Immediately, his hand was fixed.

Ed stared. "Wow..."

Yamcha having been fixed, Bulma turned to Ed. "Now, I'd like to see your shoulder. Since you haven't had any formal training, you shouldn't have been able to break Yamcha's hand."

"I didn't. He broke it himself."

Bulma sighed. "Ed, please take your shirt off."

"Why should I?"

Bulma glared at him and pulled out her Frying Pan of Terror. Ed flinched and held up his hands in surrender.

"All right, all right, I'll take it off!"

Yamcha looked at Ed curiously. "You know what she can do with it even though she's never used it around you?"

"Winry likes to use my head as target practice for her wrenches."

Yamcha stared. "Oh..."

"Yeah."

Bulma's glare intensified, and Ed, not wanting to be hit by her Frying Pan, hurriedly shrugged his overcoat off.

Bulma gasped as his right arm cane into view.

"Wh... what?"

"I lost my arm a few years ago, so I got a replacement," Ed said, as if having a completely metal arm was the most common thing in the world.

Bulma, Yamcha, and even Vegeta were now staring in amazement at Ed's arm. (He had managed to keep his shirt on without Bulma Frying Panning him.) The former two were also gaping openly, but Vegeta, being the almighty Saiyan Prince he is, was above that.

"I... I've never seen this sort of technology before..." Bulma murmured, the scientist in her taking over as she reached for the poor alchemist's arm.

"Umm... What are you doing?" Ed asked uncomfortably, pulling his over-abused arm out of her grasp.

"I'd like to examine it, to see how it works. If it gets broken, you'll need me to repair or replace it, so I have to understand it."

"Unless you can but it back together yourself," Yamcha added, having recovered from his utter shock.

Ed shook his head. "I can't perform alchemy with only one hand."

"Oh."

"Can you remove it? Is it possible to do so without breaking it?" Bulma asked, having reacquired her hold on Ed's poor arm.

"Well, yeah, but I'd prefer not to."

"Why is that?"

"Well, it's connected to my nervous system..."

"Oh."

"...And it hurts like hell to put it back on."

"I see." You could practically see the gears whirring away in Bulma's head. "Is there any way I can get a hold of a set of blueprints?"

"If I could talk to Winry, yeah."

Bulma's face set into her determined-to-invent face. "Well, I'll go fetch Mirai and get started on that right away."

"Mirai's here?" Yamcha asked.

"Yup. He arrived about an hour ago." (Really? Only an hour? It seems so much longer...)

"Oh really? It's been so long since I saw him... Can I come to meet him?"

"Sure, Yamcha! You know what they say, the more the merrier!"

000000000000000000000000000000

"You're absolutely sure that's what happened, Al?"

"Yes! We were walking to the train station when he collapsed!" The suet of armor appeared thoughtful (or as thoughtful as a suit of armor could be). "But I did hear a voice, though. I couldn't make out what it said, but I think nii-san heard it, too."

Colonel Roy Mustang looked up. "What makes you say that?"

"He reacted to it."

"Ah."

"_Hey, um... Is this thing on?"_

"_Yes, Ed, it's on. They should be able to hear us,"_ a woman's voice replied.

"_Cool. Mustang? You there?"_ came Ed's voice.

"Fullmetal?"

"Nii-san! Where are you? What happened?"

"_Al! Calm down! Yeah, it's me. Anyway, I seem to be in a different universe entirely..."_ Ed replied.

_/Crash/_

"Uh... Nii-san, what was that?"

"_Umm... I'm not quite sure... Wait a minute, where'd Yamcha go?"_

There was a pause.

"_Holy shit!"_ Ed again.

Both Al and Mustang sweatdropped.

"_Don't worry about it. Dad just blew up the GR again."_

"_Uhh... How often does this happen?"_ asked Ed's voice.

"_At least every week.. Sometimes more,"_ the boy replied.

"_Vegeta need to take an anger management class,"_ the woman declared.

"_Mom, didn't you put him in one before?"_ asked the boy.

"_Yeah,"_ she replied.

"_What happened? ...Or do I not want to know?" _Ed's voice asked uncertainly.

Al and Mustang sweatdropped again.

"_Let's see. I don't think he killed too many people..."_ the woman said thoughtfully.

They looked at each other uncertainly. _What the..._

"_Mom, aren't you going to go Frying Pan him again?"_ asked the boy.

"_Oh right!"_ she replied.

There was another pause.

"_I pity him,"_ said Ed's voice.

"_Who, Dad?"_ asked the boy.

"_Yeah,"_ Ed's voice replied.

"_Don't—When he gets it, he'll deserve it."_

"_Oh, wait... Is this thing still on?"_

The sweatdrops gained friends.

"Yes..."

"_Oops. Sorry."_

_/Clang/_

"Uhh..." Al was getting scared for his brother's health.

"_And that would be Dad's head meeting the Frying Pan of Terror again..."_

"_Yeesh. We can hear it from here?"_ asked Ed's voice.

"_She hits hard. Not to mention that Frying Pan is Saiyanproof."_

"_Uhh... Saiyanproof?"_

"_Yeah. Saiyans have supernaturally hard heads, so you have to hit hard if you want to hurt us at all,"_ the boy said.

"'Saiyan'? Nii-san, who is that?"

"_Aah! Sorry, I forgot about introductions! The one with me is Mirai Trunks Briefs."_

"_Call me Mirai. It lets people know which Trunks you're talking to."_

"_And on the other end is my little brother Alphonse—"_

"Hello."

"_Hey."_ Mirai.

"—_And Colonel Roy Mustang."_

"Hello."

"_Hi."_ Mirai again.

"Who was that woman, nii-san?"

"_Oh. Th—"_ the other boy cut him off.

"_That would be my mom, Bulma Briefs. Oh yeah, before I forget the reason why we called, do either of you two know where we can find a set of blueprints for Ed's arm?"_

000000000000000000000000000000

Wheeee! Another chapter done! And all because my muse is constantly asking me if I've written any more... Believe it or not, annoying me is a good way to get me to continue writing. As my brother well knows... /sweatdrops/ Anyway, please leave me a review before you leave!


	5. Conversations and Explanations

Summary: A mysterious stranger takes Edward Elric and deposits him in the DBZ world.

Disclaimer: (it walks alone and BritKit are sitting a lunch table)

BritKit:...reduced fat milk with Vitamin A palpitate and Vitamin D3 added, high fructose corn syrup (that's sugar), cocoa processed with alkali? (What the _hell_ is that?) cellulose gel, (ew...) nonfat milk (why is that one of the _last_ ingredients?) calcium carbonate, sugar, cellulose gum, Guar (huh?) gum, Xanthan gum, salt—SALT! Why is there _SALT _in my milkshake/seethes/

it walks alone: ...Um.

BK: (continues to rant)

IWA: (waits)

BK: (keeps ranting)

IWA: ... (gets sick of waiting) Are you done yet?

BK: NO! I _cannot_ believe they put SALT in my beloved milkshake! (storms around room ranting)

IWA: ... Right. Moving on. Since my muse appears to be otherwise occupied...

BK: (in distance) Salt? SALT? Why _SALT_ of all things? WHY!

IWA: (sweatdrops) I guess I'll just have to do the disclaimer myself. FMA and DBZ do _not_ belong to me, I am not making any money off of this, but would someone please tell me is the FMA creators decide to sell Ed... (crash is heard, and more ranting of "SALT!") Oh dear, Mom liked that window... Cookies to anyone who can guess what kind of milkshake BritKit had!

BK: (walks in) I am going to _sue_ Nestle! I will go to... to... looks at bottle Nestle USA, Inc, Glendale, CA, 91203 USA © Nestle and DEMAND to know why there is salt in my milkshake!

IWA: You do that. Have fun!

Anywho, Review Responses:

**miroku-has-darkness:** Glad you like it, seeing as how you don't like my other story...

"Speaking" _Thoughts _(Me to you) _"Telephone or other such communication device"_

Last time:

"_That would be my mom, Bulma Briefs. Oh yeah, before I forget the reason why we called, do either of you two know where we can find a set of blueprints for Ed's arm?"_

**Chapter 5: Conversations and Explanations**

There was a long pause.

"You told them, Fullmetal?" Mustang asked.

"_Well, not really. Yamcha punched my shoulder and killed his hand."_

"'Killed his hand'?" Al asked, confused.

"_Yeah. It was all bloody and broken. But he's fine now,"_ Mirai supplied.

"How?" Mustang asked.

"_Bulma gave him something called a 'Senzu'. Supposedly it's a mystical bean that can heal injuries and restore energy. And it works, too. I saw his hand healed."_ Ed's voice sounded excited.

"Can it fix anything, nii-san?"

"_Injuries, yes. Diseases, no. If a wound has closed completely, then the Senzu won't heal it,"_ Mirai answered.

"_Huh?"_

"_You saw Yamcha, Ed—did you notice his scars weren't healed along with his hand?"_

"_Oh yeah."_

"So would a Senzu heal Fullmetal's arm?" Mustang asked.

"_Hmm... Probably, if the original wound hasn't healed over—"_ Mirai started.

"_It hasn't. It can't, 'cause the auto-mail needs to be attached directly to the nerves,"_ Ed interjected.

"_And if we can get the arm off,"_ Mirai finished, after pausing to let Ed speak.

"_Which is why we want to talk to Winry and see if she could come here or we go there,"_ Ed's voice declared.

"Last I heard, nii-san, she was still in Resembool," Al offered.

"_Well, could you bring her to wherever you are? Mom and I have been trying, and we can't get through to anywhere else."_

"You mean the only place we can talk is in my office?"

Ed's voice snickered. _"Now you can never be sure we're not listening in, Colonel."_

Mustang rolled his eyes. "Very funny, Fullmetal."

"Do you want me to call Winry, nii-san?"

"_Oh, hey, Mirai, if someone's on speaker in the Colonel's office, can they hear us?"_

"_Probably. This is a new invention. Neither Mom nor I have ever tried it before."_

"_Yeah, Al. Could you call Winry and put her on speaker?"_

"Sure, nii-san."

The suit of armor glanced at Colonel Mustang, who nodded and handed the phone over. Al dialed a number and waited.

"Yes, Winry/"

Pause.

"No, I'm fine. As far as I know, nii-san's fine too."

Another pause.

"Can I put you on speaker so he can talk to you?"

Yet another pause.

"Because he's not here."

Pause. Again. Just not as long as the others.

Al nodded, reached over, and hit the 'speaker' button.

"Okay, Winry, you're on speaker now."

"_Hey, Winry,"_ Ed's voice called.

"_Ed! Where are you! Al said you're not with him!"_

"_Yeah, I'm not there."_

"_Well, where are you, then!"_

"_Umm... Mirai?"_

Mirai sighed. _"Didn't Mom tell you? Capsule Corp in West City."_

Mustang stiffened. "West City?"

Before Ed or Mirai could reply, the sound of footsteps, something being dragged (A/N: Against its will.. . ) and muffled cursing could be heard.

"_Oh... Hey Mom,"_ Mirai said, a bit uncertainly.

"_Hello!"_ the woman from before chirped.

"_Before any of you ask, the woman is Mirai's mom and the one who's cursing is Vegeta, Mirai's dad,"_ Ed's voice informed them.

"_Um, Mom? You didn't knock Dad out, did you?"_

"_Shut up, brat."_

"_And hello to you too, Dad."_

Al and Mustang sweatdropped.

"_Er... Bulma, I think you can let go of Vegeta's hair now. He'd probably like to stand up,"_ Ed suggested.

The sweatdrops gained friends.

"_Huh? Oh! Oops... Sorry, Vegeta."_

The one who was probably 'Vegeta' growled. _"Be quiet, onna."_

_/Clang/_

"_VEGETA!"_ the woman screamed. _"I have a name, you know. The LEAST you could do would be to USE IT!"_

The sweatdrops seemed to be growing even more popular.

Bulma's rang was followed by several more clangs and a few yelps of pain from Vegeta.

"_ONNA!"_

_/CLANG/_

"_Y'know, Dad, that's what got you into this mess in the first place..."_

_/Clang/_

"_Ow! Mom, what was that for!"_

"_Bulma, I think I need to take this away from you now..."_ came Ed's voice.

There was a muted scuffle.

"_My Frying Pan!"_

"_Wow... He's brave enough to take Mom's Frying Pan of Terror away from her? I'm impressed!"_ And Mirai really did sound impressed.

The scuffle ended, probably with Ed keeping the 'Frying Pan of Terror' away from Bulma.

Pause.

"_Wow. You gave Vegeta a worse beating than I ever got from Winry."_

Winry snapped out of her daze. _"Hey! I resent that!"_

"_Well, it's true!"_

"_That's it! The next time I see you, your head is going to meet my Wrench of Hitting Elrics."_

Everybody present sweatdropped hugely. It was obvious that she was petting her wrench, even over the phone.

"Uh, Winry? I thought you broke it on nii-san's head..."

"_I got a new one."_

"_...Crap."_

"C'mon, nii-san. You should have expected that."

000000000000000000000000000000

Everyone turned to Ed, incredulously. A single, large sweatdrop was visible on the back of his head.

"Actually, Al, I kinda did. I was just hoping she'd forget."

"_Oh."_

There was a pause.

"_Umm, nii-san?"_

"Yeah, Al?"

"_Err... Are you going to ask Winry.?"_

"_Ask me what?"_

Ed sighed. "I was when she calmed down. But since you've mentioned it now, she's not going to get off my case about it until I tell her."

"_Sorry, nii-san."_

"_Ask me what?"_ Winry repeated, growing impatient.

"If I could have a set of blueprints for my auto-mail."

There was a pause.

"_Did you break it again?"_

Yamcha walked in at that moment, followed closely by Chibi Trunks and Goten. He looked at Ed incredulously. "You _can_ break it?"

Ed turned around, careful to keep the Frying Pan out of Bulma's reach. "When thing that aren't even human are out to kill you, yeah."

"_Aren't even human!"_ Winry screamed.

Ed winced. "Uhh, yeah."

There was a muffled smack. _"So that's how you manage to destroy my masterpieces AND Al at the same time!"_

"Hey!" Ed was getting ticked. "I've never destroyed Al!"

"_No, nii-san,"_ Al said dryly. _"Half my armor was merely deconstructed."_

Ed deflated. "Yeah, sorry about that, Al."

"Armor?" asked Yamcha.

Ed froze. "Uhh..."

"_...It's a hobby,"_ Al supplied.

"Anyway, about the blueprints..." Ed reminded them, shaking his head as if to clear it.

"_Oh yeah. I'll give 'em to Al the next time he visits."_

"_I can go now,"_ Al supplied.

"You do that, Al. We'll see about transporting objects (and people, too) between universes."

"_Wait a minute—Universes!"_

"Yes, Winry, universes." Ed sighed.

00000000000000000000000000000000

Another chapter done! Anywho, I can actually give you a hint about the next one, seeing as how I have it written, I'm just waiting for my muse to write a disclaimer. All I can say is, "Poor Roy. Poor, poor, Roy. And pity the chibis." Anywho, please leave me a review before you go!"


	6. Cheerio, Colonel!

**Summary:** A mysterious stranger takes Edward Elric and deposits him in the DBZ world.

**Disclaimer:** (it walks alone is sitting at alunch table)

it walks alone: (scribble, scribble)

BritKit: (dashes in, dashes to vending machines, buys cookies, dashes to table, pounces on cookies) FOOOOOD!

IWA: (notices cookie crumbs flying everywhere) And hello to you too.

BK: (crunch munch) Mrgle brgle.

IWA: (stares) Beg pardon?

BK: (swallows) Hi.

IWA: (tries to steal cookie crumb)

BK: (pounces on cookie crumb and scarfs it down)

IWA: T.T

BK: Growl snarl. (munches)

IWA: (scooches away) No lunch today, huh.

BK: (devours cookies)

IWA: I'll take that as a yes. (turns to readers, ignoring flying crumbs and loud crunching behind her) Just for the record, DBZ and FMA belong to their respective authors, not me, and probably will never be owned by me. By the way, I also don't own Cheerios.

BK: (munch crunch snarl)

IWA: (watches) Riiiight. Well then, on to Review Responses!

**miroku-has-darkness:** True, but that doesn't mean I can't _want_ to be...

**Vyrexuviel:** Were you really that hyper, or was that just your online personality?

**Suuki-Aldrea:** Not really. But that just makes it funnier! (According to my muse and me, anyway...)

**WildfireDreams:** Probably, and thanks.

"Speaking" _Thoughts _(Me to you) _"Telephone or other such communication device"_

**Last time:**

"You do that, Al. We'll see about transporting objects (and people, too) between universes."

"_Wait a minute—Universes!"_

"Yes, Winry, universes." Ed sighed.

**Chapter 6: Cheerio, Colonel!**

About a week later, Ed called Mustang again. Fortunately, he was smart enough not to talk immediately. He waited until Riza Hawkeye had left the room before addressing the Colonel.

"_Uhh... Mustang? Are you alone?"_

"Yes, Fullmetal."

"_Great. Bulma and Mirai have just finished debugging an invention that should transport objects from this universe to yours, and they want to test it out."_

"So... What?"

"_I'll send you something. If all the calculations are correct, it'll show up on your desk."_

"Should I get Al and Winry?"

"_They're there? Sure. I'll wait."_

Mustang nodded, even though Ed couldn't see, and left to find Al and Winry.

About 10 minutes later, he came back. "We're back, Fullmetal," he announced.

Before Ed could reply, though, Winry, looking around, stated the obvious. "But he's not here..."

"_Didn't I tell you that before?"_

She jumped. "Ed! Where are you?"

"_Urgh. Capsule Corp in West City. Now, do you want me to send it now...?"_

Mustang shrugged. "Sure."

There was a hum, a flash of light, and then something fell a few inches to the Colonel's desk. Said Colonel walked over and picked it up. It was a picture featuring a rather large group of people, Ed included. It was apparently supposed to be a static picture, but something had happened and it became a candid shot. There were names written on it.

"A labeled picture...?"

"_Uh-huh. So you can get a picture of who I'm talking to over here."_

"I see."

In the picture, a blue-haired woman labeled 'Bulma Briefs' had a frying pan out and was chasing a flame-haired man labeled 'Vegeta. A woman labeled 'Chi-Chi Son' was Frying Panning a man with a halo labeled 'Goku Son' while a teen labeled 'Gohan Son' tried to keep her back. A lavender-haired ten labeled 'Mirai Trunks Briefs' was sweatdropping while watching his parents. A black-haired chibi labeled 'Goten Son' and a lavender-haired chibi labeled 'Chibi Trunks Briefs' were sitting off to the side munching popcorn. On the other side were a scarred man labeled 'Yamcha Bandit', a three-eyed man labeled 'Tien', a mime-ish floating infant labeled 'Chaozu', a very short man labeled 'Krillen Chestnut', an impassive blonde woman labeled 'Eighteen' holding a chibi labeled 'Marron Chestnut', a seven foot tall green man labeled 'Piccolo', a green teenager with a staff labeled 'Dende', and Ed, sweatdropping at the camera.

Winry stared at the picture. "Oh wow..."

"_Yeah. Popo volunteered to take the picture since he really isn't part of the group."_

"'Popo'?"

"_Dende's helper. By the way, on a not-so-completely-unrelated subject, I believe in a god now."_

"Eh? Why, nii-san?"

"_Dende IS God."_

They all stared at the picture of the teenaged god.

"Oh..." Winry murmured.

"_Oh yeah... Mirai's been bugging me for a picture of you guys so he knows who he's talking to. Do you happen to have one?"_

"Uh... Not that I know. I'll see if I can get one, Hughes probably carries his camera with him at all times. Oh, do you want me to tell them where you are?" Mustang responded.

"_Sure. Fine by me. And can you label the picture with ranks, too?"_

"Of course."

00000000000000000000000000000000

Somehow, Mustang had managed to get Armstrong (sparkling, of course...), Hughes, Riza, and Havoc to agree to this. The picture wasn't as candid as the one Ed had sent, but as per the short alchemist's request, it was labeled.

They were all currently assembles in Mustang's office, wondering about Ed's predicament. Needless to say, all those who hadn't spoken with Ed while he was away jumped a bit when Mustang announced, seemingly to thin air, "We're all here, Fullmetal. You there?"

They jumped again when Ed's voice responded, _"Yeah. You got the picture?"_

"Yep."

"_Good. Put it in the center of your desk and move any other papers away from it, will you?"_

Roy nodded, even though he knew Ed couldn't see him.

"We need to be able to see each other."

"_Hmm..."_ a woman said, causing everyone to jump. _"I'll have to talk to Bulma about that."_

Ed's voice snickered. _"I think you scared them, Chi-Chi."_

Mustang blinked. _So that was Chi-Chi..._

"_they shouldn't be scared yet. Wait 'till she gets mad..."_

"_And you'd know from experience, wouldn't you, Gohan?"_

"_Well, yeah..."_

"_Mm-hmm. I've seen her beating your dad..."_

"_Yeah. And she wasn't even that mad."_

"_Ouch."_

"_Understatement."_

"Can we get to business, here?" Mustang nearly growled.

"_Jeez, Mustang, calm down. Sure."_

"The picture's ready, Fullmetal."

"_Right."_

There was a hum, then a flash of light, and the picture which Mustang had so recently put on his desk was gone.

Everyone assembles stared at where the picture had been.

"Whoa..."

00000000000000000000000000000000

Chi-Chi, Gohan, and Ed (since they were the only ones there) looked at the picture that had appeared in the middle of the table.

"Uniforms...? Oh, they're military," Gohan observed, sounding slightly annoyed.

Ed glared at him. "What's with the attitude, Gohan?"

Gohan shrugged. "We don't have much of a military here. It was marginalized after years of peace. And what we do have is composed of idiots. I mean, after the first few villains they couldn't handle, you'd think they'd leave the major ones to those who _can_."

"_Marginalized?"_ Mustang asked.

"Yeah."

"_I see."_

"So you can't really blame me, can you?"

"Can we drop the subject, please?" asked Ed.

"Sorry, Ed," Gohan replied.

00000000000000000000000000000000

The next morning, Mustang was explaining Ed's predicament to Riza, Hughes, Havoc, Armstrong, and Winry with Al's help when he noticed muffled footsteps and giggling.

"...And before you ask any questions, will _somebody_ go figure out who's there?" he finished.

Hughes got up, opened the door, and looked around. "I don't see anyone..."

"_Hey! Put it in the middle of the table, dummy!"_ someone whispered.

Now everyone was looking around in confusion.

Then there came a hum.

They looked at each other, all thinking the same thing: _Uh-oh..._

There was a flash of light, and something appeared about 2 inches above Mustang's head and dropped onto it.

"_Oh, man, we got the coordinates wrong!"_

They all turned to Mustang and burst out laughing.

There was an upside down cereal bowl on his head. Milk and soggy Cheerios were dripping down his face and hair and onto his blue uniform.

"Um, Colonel? Why is there an upside down cereal bowl on your head?" Hughes managed to gasp out between laughs.

"_Oops..."_

"_You mean it landed on his head? Really? Wow..."_

"_Goten, you dummy!"_

"_It's not nice to call someone a dummy, Trunks."_

Riza pulled out her guns. "Show yourselves! Who are you and what the _hell_ did you do to my commanding officer!"

"_Uhh... Who is that?"_ Trunks whispered.

"You'd better come out! Now?"

"_Hey, don't tell me what to do!"_

"I can if I want to! Now come out!"

"_Make me!"_

"_Uhh... Trunks?"_

"Come out or I'll shoot!"

Everyone in the Colonel's office cringed (except Mustang, as he was still busy dripping milk and Cheerios).

"_Nyaah!"_

"_Trunks?"_

"I'm serious!"

"_Trunks!"_

"_Not now, Goten!"_

"Uhh... First Lieutenant Hawkeye?" Al asked timidly.

"What is it?"

The suit of armor picked up the picture still lying on the soggy (and now angry) Colonel's desk and pointed to the two chibis off to the side munching popcorn. "They're these two."

Riza sated at the picture, then put her guns away and sat down, embarrassed.

"_Trunks!"_

"_Shut up or my mom'll hear us!"_

"_She already has!"_

"_BRATS!"_ Vegeta's voice yelled.

"_Uh-oh. RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!"_

"_Not so fast, Demonlings,"_ Gohan's voice declared.

00000000000000000000000000000000

Whoo-hoo! I really like this chapter! Not only do I get to torture the Brats, but also Colonel Mustang! Yes! Anywho, please leave me a review on your way out!


	7. Revelations

**Summary:** A mysterious stranger takes Edward Elric and deposits him in the DBZ world.

**Disclaimer:**

it walks alone: (bounce bounce bounce bounce)

BritKit: (walks in) (sees IWA bouncing off cafeteria walls and ceiling) O.O

IWA: (BOUNCE BOUNCE BOUNCE) WEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

BK: Hyper much? (following IWA's bounces with eyes)

IWA: (randomhyperbabble)

BK: Slow down.

IWA: (hyperbabble)

BK: (sweatdrops) Slower...

IWA: (babble)

BK: Slow... Down...

IWA: ...andthenIdidthisandthatandwentALLLLLLoverandsomeonegavemeacookiesoIateitandit'salmostholidaysandIamsoooooooohyperandIwannagohomeandI'mgonnagobouncesomemorebye!

BK: (**giant** sweatdrop) Right. You do that.

IWA: (bounces off wall and ceiling some more)

BK: Gods she's crazy...

(something breaks and there is a distant cry of "WEEEEE!")

BK: Yup. Definitely crazy.

IWA: (bouncebouncebouncebouncebounceBOUNCE)

BK: (ducks)

IWA: (flies over BK) WAHOOOO!

BK: I'm gonna die...

IWA: (flies BACK over BritKit)

IWA: ALRIGHTY!SosincethewholepointofthisistotellallofYOUthatIDON'TOWNFMAORDBZandneverwillandI'mbabblingagainaren'tI?

BK: Yup.

IWA: I'mgonnashutupnow.

(there is silence)

BK: ...

IWA: ...

(there is more silence)

BK: ARGG! TOO MUCH SILENCE! MUST MAKE NOISE! (storms off smashing everything in her way)

IWA: And she says I'M crazy...

Anywho! Review Responses:

**Vyrexuviel:** Oookaaay... Were you laughing, or was that Kice?

**WildfireDreams:** Writing!

**Suuki-Aldrea:** Glad you liked it! Hope this chapter's as good!

**BritKit:** Whoo-hoo! My own muse decided to review me!

"Speaking" _Thoughts _(Me to you) _"Telephone or other such communication device"_

**Last time:**

"_BRATS!"_ Vegeta's voice yelled.

"_Uh-oh. RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!"_

"_Not so fast, Demonlings,"_ Gohan's voice declared.

**Chapter 7: Revelations**

"Nii-chan!"

"Gohan!"

"SAVE US!" the two chibis wailed in unison.

Gohan snorted. "You think I'd do that? Bulma was chewing Vegeta out, turned around, and _poof!_ you're gone! She's practically put out a bounty on you two!"

"Brats!"

"They're in here, Vegeta! Oh, is this on?"

"_Yes..."_ Mustang growled, the first thing he'd said since the bowl of cereal had appeared.

"Sorry. Hope they didn't prank you too badly."

"_They dropped a bowl of cereal on my head!"_ Mustang yelled.

Gohan glared at the two chibis, who gulped nervously. "So _that's_ where that bowl went. Bulma kept trying to pin that one on me."

Bulma and Vegeta walked in, followed by a very confused Mirai.

"Pin what one on you?" Bulma asked Gohan.

"The bowl." The eldest demi-Saiyan jerked his thumb at the invention in the middle of the room. "It's in Ed's world now. I think it fell on somebody's head."

"_Mine."_

"And who might you be?" Bulma asked.

"_Colonel Mustang."_

Vegeta Death-Glared™ at the chibis, who cringed.

Gohan, catching sight of Mirai's utterly confused expression, explained. "We call Trunks and Goten the Brats."

"Why?"

"Well, they're formally known as the Demon Brats, but Brats is shorter and easier to scream at the top of your lungs."

"Come on, Chibi-me can't be that bad."

Gohan snorted. "Vegeta didn't raise you."

"Good point."

"So... What did they do?" Bulma asked, turning to the machine.

"_They dropped an upside down bowl of soggy Cheerios on my head, dammit!"_

"Ooh. Not fun. Trunks, you are going to be stuck in the GR with Vegeta for a week if you do something like this again. This time," and here the poor lavender-haired chibi gulped, "you will be eating only human-sized rations." Said chibi's eyes widened. "And NO SNACKS." His jaw dropped.

"B-b-but Mom!"

"Don't 'but' me, young man! Anything else out of you and I'll sic Vegeta on you this week!"

Chibi Trunks closed his mouth with an audible 'click' upon seeing Vegeta's Smirk™.

"Yes, Mom," said chibi mumbled.

00000000000000000000000000000000

Later, after Mustang had cleaned up his hair and changed his uniform (at least the parts that got milk and Cheerios on them), he and the others who had witnessed the 'soggy cereal incident', as it was coming to be called (much to the Colonel's chagrin), minus Havoc, as he had other duties, had gotten together again—not in the Colonel's office, though—next door, so nothing could be dropped on them (he, you can't blame Mustang for being slightly paranoid!) but close enough so that if Ed yelled, they could still hear him.

"Ya hafta admit, Colonel, that was bunny."

"Be quiet, Hughes."

Colonel Mustang was trying to establish a different subject, but also failing miserably. Hughes just refused to drop it.

"I just wish I'd had my camera..."

"Hughes..." Mustang growled, lifting one gloved hand. The Lieutenant Colonel instantly shut up.

"Thank you. Now, we need to see if there's any way we can help the 'Z-Senshi' send Fullmetal back."

"'Z-Senshi'?" Riza repeated.

"The group nii-san's with now," Al supplied.

Riza nodded in understanding.

"_Hey! Colonel! Hello! Anyone there?"_

"Fullmetal!"

Everyone stood up and ran into Colonel Mustang's office, most of them apologizing.

"_Hey! Calm down! It's okay! Anyway, Mirai and Bulma just told me that they came up with a way to transmit images. You want to try it?"_

"Sure, nii-san!"

"_Okay. A TV screen and camera should show up on your desk. You can put them anywhere, but I suggest putting them near each other,"_ Mirai said.

"Right."

There was the by now familiar hum and flash of light and a flatscreen TV and videocamera appeared on the Colonel's desk.

"Sooo... How do I put them, say, on a wall?"

"_Mount it. There should be instructions on the back."_

Once Mustang had mounted the screen and the camera above it, resting on top, he announced, "Well, they're in. Now what?"

"_Turn 'em on. There should be a 'power' button on both."_

The Colonel looked. Sure enough, there was a button marked 'power' on the lower right corner of the screen. He pushed it, and it turned on, showing Ed, Mirai, Bulma, and Gohan (he checked the picture to be sure) watching. He turned the camera on, and the people on the screen blinked.

Al waved. "Hi, nii-san!"

Ed grinned. _"Hey, Al."_

Gohan blinked. _"That's Al?"_

"_Uhh... Yeah."_

"_Why is he wearing armor?"_

The two brothers looked at each other uncertainly. "It's a hobby," they said in unison.

Mirai looked between the two of them. _"Riiight."_

Bulma clapped her hands, causing everyone who'd seen Ed perform alchemy (the FMA group) to jump. _"Anyway, how's the picture?"_

Mustang blinked. "Fine..."

The blue-haired genius smiled happily. _"Great!"_

_/CRASH/_

Everyone in the Colonel's office jumped. "What was that?"

Bulma was obviously angry again. _"I am so going to hit him this time..."_

Mirai just shrugged. _"Dad blew up the GR again."_

Ed groaned, rolling his eyes. _"Great. Just great. Bulma's gonna rope me into helping this time..."_

"That's a problem?"

Ed glared at Hughes, who had spoken. _"When Vegeta's growling over my shoulder and insulting me every chance he can get, yes, it is a problem."_

Bulma turned to him. _"He insults you?"_

Ed sighed. _"Probably not more than he insults everyone else..."_

"_I see. Well, I'll go fetch him—"_

"_No need, Mom. He's on his way here."_

"_Good. I can Frying Pan him now."_

("Since when did 'frying pan' become a verb?" Hughes asked Risa.

(She shrugged, not speaking since she was still embarrassed about her flipping over the two chibis earlier and she didn't want anyone to know it was her.)

Just then, Havoc, followed by Sergeant Brosh and Second Lieutenant Ross threw open the door, ran in, tripped over Al (who had been sitting near the door, between it and the Colonel's desk), and went flying, accompanied by a small 'popping' sound.

Al, being the gentleman he is, got up to help. However, when the suit of armor leaned forward, his chest plate swung forward as well. (Poor Al...) He froze, then hastily straightened up again.

00000000000000000000000000000000

Vegeta chose that moment to walk into the room.

He looked around at all the stunned faces, looked at the screen, and saw Al with his chest plate hanging open, and said, "What is everyone staring at? It's a suit of armor. Nothing special. And onna, you need to fix the GR again."

Bulma and Ed snapped out of their daze and both turned angrily to Vegeta. Unfortunately for the Saiyan Prince, Bulma was faster.

"VEGETA! Can't you go one week without breaking something!" she screamed, bringing her infamous Frying Pan of Terror down on his head with a CLANG and waking everyone else up in the process.

Gohan turned to Ed, very curious. "Ed? You said Al's your brother. Then you said that that suit of armor is Al. How can your brother be an empty suit of armor?"

Ed froze, then turned back to look at Al, who was putting his chest plate back. Al nodded. Ed sighed and closed his eyes.

"I... Our mother died years ago. Al and I tried to bring her back to life. We failed." He paused. "When we failed, I lost an arm and a leg and Al lost his whole body."

"But then, how could he be alive?" Mirai asked, confused.

"I managed to bind his soul into a suit of armor that happened to be in the room"

Bulma was, by this time, sobbing. She threw her arms around Ed and sobbed, "Oh, you poor boy! No one should have to go through that!"

Those who had heard the full story were standing (or sitting, as the case may be) with bowed heads. Those who hadn't were staring at the Elrics in astonishment, even Vegeta.

Then, Mirai, being the scientist he is, had an idea.

"Hey. I just had an idea. This might be taking advantage of Al's condition, but... Since he doesn't have a living body, why don't we sen him through to our world?"

00000000000000000000000000000000

Another chapter typed! Cool! I can give you a sneak peek at the next chapter, if you want: Mustang torture! In front of his superiors, no less! Anywho, please leave me a review on your way out.


	8. Spastic Rants and Torture Plots

**Summary:** A mysterious stranger takes Edward Elric and deposits him in the DBZ world.

**Disclaimer:** (after school, in the library: it walks alone, BritKit, and SailorKMoonie are sitting at a table)

it walks alone: (scribbles madly on a piece of paper)

SailorKMoonie: (tries to sneak look)

(THWACK)

SKM: T.T

BritKit: (rolls eyes)

IWA: (goes back to scribbling)

BK: (in very very VERY quiet whisper) You should have expected that.

SKM: Shaddap.

BK: (evil grin)

BK: (leans over to SKM) (in normal voice) Soo... Whachya readin?

Librarian: Shhh!

BK & SKM: o.o Meep

BK: (in impossible to hear whisper) Why are we here again?

SKM: (in equally quiet whisper) Do you know a better place?

BK: (thinks) ...No.

SKM: Well, that explains it.

BK: Our school sucks.

SKM: Mm-hmm...

BK: It's falling apart.

SKM: Mm-hmm...

BK: Do you like it here?

SKM: Mm-hmm...

BK: -.-

BK: Can I have your cell phone?

SKM: Mm-hmm... Waitasecond, BRITKIT!

BK: XD

SKM: (evil glare) Rrrrrg...

Librarian: (glare) Hush!

BK & SKM: (ignore)

BK: Alright you said I could have your cell phone, hand it over.

SKM: Heck no. You tricked me!

Librarian: Girls!

BK: Did not.

SKM: Did too.

BK: Did not!

SKM: (stands up) Did too!

Librarian: (louder this time) Girls!

BK: Did not did not did not!

SKM: Did too did too did TOO!

Librarian: (walks over) GIRLS!

BK & SKM: O.O Meep

Librarian: Honestly! Yelling in the library! How old are you two? Six?

IWA: Yup.

BK & SKM: (glare at IWA)

Librarian: What are you two doing, anyways?

BK: (very perky all of a sudden) Plotting to take over the world!

SKM: (hits BK with book) No we're not!

(librarian leaves)

SKM:(shifty eyes)

SKM: (spreads maps on table, over IWA's writing) So we'll attack Australia from THIS direction...

IWA: (notices she's writing on world domination maps, not her story paper) Oi!

BK & SKM: (look up)

IWA: If you two don't mind, couldyoupleasegetyourmapsoffmystory!

BK & SKM: O.O Mweep

IWA: Not that I have anything against world domination...

BK: (mutters) I should hope not, you're helping.

IWA: But I DON'T think we should be plotting in the GODS-DAMNED SCHOOL LIBRARY!

Everyone in room: (staaare)

SKM: ...Er, right. (grabs stuff) We'll be going now.

BK: Nice meeting you!

IWA: And I don't own FMA or DBZ and never will.

(all dash away)

Librarian: ...What on _earth?_

Anywho! Review Responses:

**Vyrexuviel:** Ooohhh... I didn't know you're online cat could talk. That makes a lot of difference. And to answer your musing, I'm not sure.

"Speaking" _Thoughts _(Me to you) _"Telephone or other such communication device"_

**Last time:**

Then, Mirai, being the scientist he is, had an idea.

"Hey. I just had an idea. This might be taking advantage of Al's condition, but... Since he doesn't have a living body, why don't we sen him through to our world?"

**Chapter 8: Spastic Rants and Torture Plots**

There was a pause as everyone absorbed this. Then, hell broke loose in the form of Edward Elric.

"OH HELL NO! YOU ARE NOT PUTTING MY BROTHER THROUGH THAT CONTRAPTION OF YOURS!"

"_Would he even fit on my desk?"_ Colonel Mustang mused.

Everyone turned to look at Mustang's desk, which was broken down the middle with a very dazed Havoc leaning against it. Mustang seemed to remember something, and stood up and leaned over his trashed desk to look down at Havoc.

"_By the way, Lieutenant, what was so important that you had to come barreling into my office and make a crater of my desk?"_

The poor Second Lieutenant Havoc blinked up at him for a few moments as he processed the question. Then he bolted upright and nearly shouted, _"Colonel! You're late for your meeting! It starts in..."_ He glanced at his watch. _"10 minutes and it's on the other side of the building!"_

Mustang stared at him for a minute, then cursed loudly and ran out of the room.

Al turned to the Colonel's mutilated desk. _"He left his coat."_

Sure enough, Mustang's coat was hanging on the back of said Colonel's chair.

Al then turned back to his older brother. _"Nii-san. About my going between worlds..."_

"NO! ABSOLUTELY NOT! IT'S TOO RISKY! I WON'T ALLOW IT!" Ed spazzed.

"_But nii-san, I want to."_

There was a pause.

"What?" Ed asked, dazed.

"_Nii-san, I want to try it. I know it'll be risky, but we have to try. I want to be useful, and this seems to be the only way I can."_

Bulma, looking between the two brothers, decided evacuation was in order. "I think this would be a good time to finish Frying Panning Vegeta. Anyone who wants to watch can come."

Mirai and Gohan stared at her strangely. Then comprehension dawned and they nodded eagerly.

Bulma grabbed Vegeta by the hair and shoved him out of the room, followed by Mirai and Gohan.

Riza looked around. _"And we should be at the Colonel's meeting,"_ she admonished, and proceeded to drag a still-dizzy Second Lieutenant Havoc toward the door. The other military people followed her out.

00000000000000000000000000000000

Ed and Al were still watching each other.

"_Al... Y-you really think you're not useful?"_

"Not really. Not usually. But now..."

Ed bowed his head. _"Yeah..."_

"_Psst! Hey, Ed!"_

Ed's head came up and he turned to the door. _"Trunks? Didn't Bulma ground you from here?"_ he asked, going over and opening the door, revealing the two chibis.

"_Well, yeah, but we're not in there, are we?"_

Ed sighed and shook his head. _"Okay, then, why are you here?"_

Trunks held up something in his hand that Al couldn't see.

More whispering ensued.

About a minute later, (after a conversation that Al couldn't hear) Ed blinked. _"Actually..."_

"_Someone's coming!"_ Goten warned.

"_Hurry! Take it!"_ Trunks whispered, thrusting the something he was holding into Ed's hands.

"_Hey. Brats. There you are,"_ Gohan's voice said. _"You know you're not allowed in there."_

"_But we wanted to tell Ed something,"_ Trunks said.

"_Well, are you done?"_

"_Yep!"_

"_Good. Get going. Bulma wants to talk to you,"_ Gohan informed the two chibis.

Once said chibis were out of earshot, Ed turned to Gohan. _"Why are they grounded, again?"_

"_They sent a bowl of soggy Cheerios through."_

"_Really?"_

"_Yeah. I think it landed on someone's head."_

"_Whose?"_

"_I dunno. Probably someone important."_

"_Oh really..."_ Despite not being able to see his brother's face, Al could see the evil grin plastered across his features.

"Nii-san..."

"_See you, Ed."_

"_See you, Gohan."_

Gohan left, following the way the chibis had gone.

"Nii-san, if you wanted to know about the 'soggy cereal incident', you could have asked me."

"_I think I'd rather ask Mustang himself,"_ Ed replied, smirking. _"Say, Al, could you put this in Mustang's coat pocket before you give it to him?"_

"Put what, nii-san?"

"_What I'm sending you."_

There was the obligatory hum and flash of light.

Al picked up the small device.

"What is it, nii-san?"

"_Hopefully something that will allow us to move our inter-universe connection."_

"Oh. But why Colonel Mustang?"

"_Well, it's either his coat or his office."_

"But..."

"_At least this way he can leave his coat somewhere and have private conversations in his office."_

"But..."

"_I'll let you go through, Al."_

"...Alright. But I don't like it."

"_You don't have to. Just put it in his coat and give it to him."_

"...Okay, nii-san."

Al put the small device in one of Mustang's empty pockets, took the coat, and was halfway out the door when Ed called him back.

"_Oh! Hey, Al?"_

"What is it now, nii-san?"

"_Don't tell him, okay?"_

"Why not?"

"_I want it to be a surprise."_

"Oh... Alright, nii-san, I won't tell him."

"_Thanks. Now get."_

00000000000000000000000000000000

Whee! Typed! Sorry about the short chapter, but I think the disclaimer makes up for it! And unlike the previous disclaimers, this one is not based on a true story. By the way, cookies to anyone who can guess (and tell me in a review) what Ed's going to do to the poor Colonel. The following is an **_IMPORTANT NOTICE:_** From now on, I will not update unless somebody I don't know reviews me! That means, if you are my brother, my muse, or any of my friends (that I know what your penname is, anyway) that I won't update just because of you. So far, I haven't gotten a review from someone I don't know, but I'm updating anyway. Thank me! And please leave me a review on your way out.


	9. Why We Don't Make Riza Mad

**Summary:** A mysterious stranger takes Edward Elric and deposits him in the DBZ world.

**Disclaimer:** (BritKit and it walks alone are sitting at a cafeteria table)

BritKit: (munch)

it walks alone: (puppy eyes)

BK: No.

IWA: (continues puppy eyes)

BK: No.

IWA: (sniffles and does more puppy eyes)

BK: Arg... (snatches food away) No! My lunch!

IWA: (whimper)

BK: Bad puppy! NO! MY FOOD! (runs away)

IWA: T.T(forgot lunch)

BK: (hides)

IWA: Well, I guess I better do the disclaimer. I do not own DBZ. I do not own FMA. I also do not own any food right now. (sniffle) (pulls out hat) Feed the authoress! Feed the authoress!

(someone drops bag of crackers in hat)

IWA: FOOD! (pounces) (munchcrunchswallow) ...I'm still hungry...

**Review Responses:**

**Vyrexuviel:** Let's see here... 1) right, 2) right, and 3) right, but not the 'landing more things on the poor Mustang'.

**WildfireDreams:** Thanks.

**SeaLover456:** Glad you like it!

**Sasha Rin:** Wow! So you like my story even though you hate DBZ... Cool!

**Belletiger:** Continuing!

**silent-flame-of-eternity:** Thanks! What a compliment! Actually, I was wondering if Riza was OOC at some points (when she flips out, for one). And no, I don't know you. So I will update!

"Speaking" _Thoughts _(Me to you) _"Telephone or other such communication device"_

**Last time:**

"Oh... Alright, nii-san, I won't tell him."

"_Thanks. Now get."_

**Chapter 9: Why We Don't Make Riza Mad**

Mustang was just about to open the door to the meeting room when he heard Al calling him.

"Colonel! You forgot your coat!"

"Thanks, Al," said Colonel replied, taking the coat and shrugging it on. "By the time I'd noticed, I didn't have time to go back and get it." That said, he opened the door and walked in, followed by the others.

"I'll wait here, Colonel," Al supplied, staying outside the room. Mustang acknowledged with a nod.

Fuhrer Bradley turned. "You're late, Colonel."

"I'm sorry, sir. It won't happen again."

"Good."

One of the bigwigs in the room stood up and opened the meeting with the typical "This meeting was called to discuss..." speech, and ended with calling on another to deliver his report.

After a few such reports, it was Mustang's turn. He stood up and announced, "The major occurrence that I have to report is that one of my state alchemists has disappeared."

Fuhrer Bradley looked up sharply. "Disappeared?"

The Colonel nodded. "Yes. We have reason to believe he is in another universe."

"Oh? Why?"

"The military where he is has been marginalized for several years."

"You have been in contact with him?"

"Yes. He—"

"_So, Mustang, I have a question for you..."_

The Colonel in question froze. _He couldn't have..._

"Colonel Mustang?" the Fuhrer asked sharply. "Who is that?"

"The missing alchemist—"

"_...Gohan told me that Chibi Trunks and Goten sent a bowl of cereal through..."_

Mustang's eyes widened. _He couldn't have... Could he?_

"If this is your missing alchemist, where is he?"

"_...And I was just wondering where, exactly, it landed."_

_He couldn't have found a way to change his communication point..._

Meanwhile, everyone who came in with Mustang was trying to keep from laughing.

"Fullmetal, I swear—"

"_Can't finish that, Mustang, if there's others around!"_

_He did. Dammit!_ thought the Colonel.

"Fullmetal? You mean the Fullmetal Alchemist?"

"Y-yes, Fuhrer."

"_So where did it land?"_

Riza Hawkeye was the first one to actually start laughing. The others soon followed. Mustang turned and glared at them.

"Will you shut up if I tell you, Fullmetal?"

"_Umm... Maybe."_

Mustang glared at the room in general. "It _landed_ on my _head_, dammit!"

There was a pause as everyone in the room stared at Mustang. Then Ed burst out laughing.

"_Hahahaha! Oh, man! That's hilarious!"_

"_Okay, Ed, I think you need to stop torturing the Colonel now."_

"Thank you, Bulma. And Frying Pan him for me, will you?"

"_Umm... That'll hurt, Mustang,"_ Ed said, suddenly sobering.

"That IS the point, Fullmetal."

"_But that Frying Pan is Saiyanproof!"_

"Saiyanproof?"

"_Yup. I use it on my good-for-nothing, arrogant Saiyan Prince of a husband whenever he ticks me off."_

"_Which happens quite frequently, seeing as how he blows up the GR at least once a week,"_ Ed chimed in.

"Uhh... I'm not going to ask."

"_Good idea. I've been staying with them, and I don't get it either."_

"Somehow, I'm not surprised," Mustang remarked dryly.

"One question, Edward. What is a 'Saiyan'?" Riza asked, having recovered from her laughter.

"_Uhh... I don't know, actually."_

"_Saiyans are aliens,"_ Bulma supplied.

"Maybe we should hold this conversation at another time," Mustang suggested. "I'm in a meeting."

"_Yeah, I know. That's why it was so funny...!"_

_/Clang/_

"_Ow! Bulma!"_

"_I told you to stop torturing him!"_

"_Sorry, Bulma."_

"_Good. Now come on. You're helping me fix the GR this time, whether you want to or not."_

"_Yes, ma'am,"_ Ed muttered.

"Sounds like she's got you wrapped around her finger, Ed," Hughes observed.

"_Hell no. She just hasn't put her Frying Pan of Terror away yet."_

"I see."

"Mr. Elric, perhaps you could end this conversation and leave us to hold our meeting in peace," Fuhrer Bradley commanded.

"_Yes, sir."_

"Good. Now, back to our previous subject, Colonel Mustang. How did he get into this other universe?"

"We don't know, sir. No one who was present at the time understood what was happening."

"I see."

And so the meeting continued.

00000000000000000000000000000000

A few hours after the meeting, the 'cereal incident crew' had locked themselves into Colonel Mustang's office. Sergeant Brosh and Second Lieutenant Ross had been posted outside the door and were attempting to answer the questions about what's going on inside by random passersby while trying to answer that selfsame question themselves.

Someone (a random passerby) stopped outside of the Colonel's office. He looked at the door. "Uhh... I need to see Colonel Mustang..."

Second Lieutenant Maria Ross looked up at the nameless officer. "I'm sorry, sir, but I can't let you in."

"Huh? Why? What's going on in there?"

The Second Lieutenant looked to Sergeant Brosh.

"Umm... Well, we haven't been able to figure that out," he said. "We keep seeing flashes of light and hearing crashes from in there." He perked up. "Hey, maybe they're taking pictures!"

Just then, there was a large, very bright flash of light and a HUGE crash.

"GODDAMMIT, THAT WAS A _NEW DESK!"_ a VERY pissed off Colonel Mustang yelled.

All three outside turned to stare at the door in abject terror.

"Or maybe not," Brosh gulped.

Suddenly, someone inside started laughing.

Just as suddenly, the laughter stopped.

Pause.

"I should run now, shouldn't I?" Havoc's voice asked.

"Yup," Hughes' voice replied.

"Running."

/WHAM/

Suddenly, the doors to the Colonel's office slammed open, smashing the two hapless guards into the walls.

/VASHOOM/

/VASHOOM/

/BANG! Bangbangbangbangbang/

"Havoc! Hold still, you goddamned -censored-!"

"So you can shoot me? No way!" Havoc yelled back.

Hughes poked his head out into the hallway. "Riza certainly has quite a mouth on her, doesn't she?"

Armstrong peeked around the door as well. "I wonder where she learned it?"

Everyone turned to Mustang, who was sitting (with anger marks all over his head, by the way) behind a refrigerator. His brand-new desk (which had been brought in during the meeting) was nowhere to be seen.

"I think I'll come back later..." the unfortunate random passerby in the hallway whimpered, then ran off as fast as his legs could take him.

Hughes turned to Major Armstrong. "Five bucks says Riza turns Havoc into Swiss cheese," he said.

Armstrong shook his head. "I don't know, the Second Lieutenant can run pretty fast when he wants to."

00000000000000000000000000000000

Meanwhile, on another floor, somewhere else in the building...

"GET BACK HERE!"

"AIEEEEEEEEEEE!"

/FWOOM/

/FWOOM/

00000000000000000000000000000000

Outside the Fuhrer's office:

"SAVE ME!"

/BANGBANGBANG/

"HAVOC!"

/WHOOSH/

/WHOOSH/

The force of the vacuum left by Havoc and Riza blew the door open.

The Fuhrer looked up.

"Do I even want to know...?"

00000000000000000000000000000000

Meanwhile, at Colonel Mustang's office...

Al looked at the doors to the Colonel's office, and pulled one away from the wall slightly. An unconscious Sergeant Brosh slumped to the ground with a 'thud'. Al stared at him for a minute, then at the wall the unfortunate soldier was shoved into. It was cracked and dented.

Just then, Colonel Mustang's voice rang out. "Can we get back to business, here? Namely, my DESK!" he yelled, slamming his hands down on his desk... er, fridge.

Al poked his head in. "What's going... Is that a refrigerator?" he asked, flabbergasted. Everyone nodded.

"...I missed something, didn't I?"

Mustang just growled.

00000000000000000000000000000000

In the DBZ world:

The two chibis were sitting in the door, seeing as how they weren't allowed in the room, with a huge tub of popcorn. Each.

Gohan finally noticed them and walked over. "You know you two aren't allowed in here..."

Trunks looked up at him. "But we're not actually IN the room... Want some popcorn?"

Gohan stared at him. "Sure," he said, and grabbed a handful. He walked back past Vegeta to his spot next to Mirai and Bulma.

He tossed a piece of popcorn into the air with the full intent of catching it in his mouth and eating it. However, there was a blur, and it vanished. Gohan blinked, shrugged, and tossed another up. It, too, vanished. After four more, he started scowling. He tossed a few more, his scowl deepening. He followed the blur with his eyes as he tossed his last piece into the air and his gaze came to rest on Vegeta, who had a handful of popcorn and was munching contentedly, smirking.

Gohan rolled his eyes.

00000000000000000000000000000000

Kind of a lame ending, I know. But it is funny, I mean Vegeta stealing popcorn from Gohan! Anywho, please leave me a review on your way out.


	10. Surprises

**Summary:** A mysterious stranger takes Edward Elric and deposits him in the DBZ world.

**Disclaimer:** (it walks alone, BritKit, and Mordecai are sitting at a lunch table)

it walks alone: (scribble)

BritKit: (munch)

Mordecai: (spins penny)

M: ...I have some good news and some bad news.

BK & IWA: (look up)

M: The good news is that I have named my penny John!

BK & IWA: (raise eyebrow)

M: The bad news is... it's a girl penny!

BK & IWA: ... (sweatdrop)

BK: Do I want to know...?

IWA: No.

BK: Didn't think so.

M: (spins John) So what does "BritKit" stand for?

BK: British Kitten. 6th grade, don't ask.

IWA: Wasn't gonna.

M: BRITISH! With the tea... and the crumpets andthedrinkingJOHN! (dives off table in search of penny)

IWA: (zips up binder)

M: (wanders under table)

IWA: (lifts up binder)

M: (comes by IWA)

/WHACK/

BK: (wince)

IWA: (satisfied smirk)

M: (hyperbabble)

M: ...Hey, that hurt.

M: ...Ow.

M: (more hyperbabble)

BK & IWA: (sweatdrop)

IWA: Anywho. So I do not own FMA or DBZ... and never will.

BK: Probably.

M: DOUBLE-SIDED TAPE!

BK & IWA: (sweatdrop)

BK: Moving _ON._

**Review Responses:**

**Vyrexuviel:** You're welcome!

**Suuki-Aldrea:** Thank you. Umm... Should I ignore her or not?

**Firehedgehog:** It was that funny...?

**Sasha Rin:** It was flattened by the refrigerator.

"Speaking" _Thoughts _(Me to you) _"Telephone or other such communication device"_

**Last time:**

Al poked his head in. "What's going... Is that a refrigerator?" he asked, flabbergasted. Everyone nodded.

"...I missed something, didn't I?"

Mustang just growled.

**Chapter 10: Surprises**

That evening, Bulma, Ed, and Al were in the transmit room or Mustang's office, depending on which world they were in. They had been sending a replica of Al's suit of armor through for a while now. Bulma and Al were trying to get Ed to _finally_ let Al actually come through. Ed was being so stubborn, though, that Al was tempted to 'accidentally' switch places with the suit of armor they were transmitting.

"Come on, Ed, surely we've run enough tests by now!" Bulma said, exasperated.

"No! We still don't know how well the blood rune will transmit!" Ed replied.

"_Nii-san, I agree with Bulma on this one..."_

"So you're all against me!"

Bulma sighed. "It's getting late. You should get to sleep, Ed. We'll do some more tests tomorrow. This argument isn't getting us anywhere."

Ed sighed as well. "Fine." He got up and left.

After half an hour of more tests and making sure Ed actually asleep, Bulma looked up at Al. "You ready, Al?"

Al nodded. _"Yes."_ He gulped.

"You're sure?"

"_Yes. Let's do this before my courage runs out."_

"Okay, Al."

"_Oh, hold on a minute."_ He walked over to the identical suit of armor now sitting in the corner and attached a sticky note to it that said, "This is not me. I am with nii-san. Please don't mistake this for me. Al" _"Okay."_

Al curled up in the smallest ball he could, considering his armor, in front of the Colonel's (_third_) desk.

"Transmitting."

There was a hum and a flash of light, and Al appeared on the floor of the transmit room with an echoing clang.

He stood up and examined his body. Everything seemed to be in order. However, he couldn't check his blood rune himself.

"Bulma? Could you check something for me?" he asked.

"Huh? Sure, Al. What?"

"My blood rune," he said, reaching up and taking his head off.

Bulma gasped. "A—Al!"

"Don't worry, Bulma. I'm fine," the headless suit of armor assured her. He bent down. "In the back of my armor, there's a letter. Can you see it?"

Bulma peered inside. "Uhh... Yup, I can see it. Looks fine."

"Thanks Bulma," he said, standing up and replacing his head. "Did I scare you?"

"W—well, it's kind of unnerving, seeing someone just pull their own head off like that," she replied, her hand on her heart.

"Sorry."

"Don't apologize. It's not your fault. Now. You're here, so you might as well stay the night. Do you need to sleep?"

"No. Umm... If it's not too much trouble, could I see your library?"

"Sure! Come on, it's this way."

00000000000000000000000000000000

The next day, Bulma, Vegeta, both Trunkses, and Al were eating breakfast. (Well, technically, Al wasn't eating, but he _was_ there, staring at Vegeta and the Trunkses. He hadn't seen _anyone_ eat that much that fast in his life.)

"Hey, where's Ed?" Mirai asked between mouthfuls.

"Probably still sleeping," Al sighed, shaking his head. "Nii-san is NOT a morning person."

"Why don't you go wake him up, then, Al?" Bulma suggested.

"Sure," Al agreed, standing up and leaving to go wake his nii-san.

Mirai watched him go. "No matter how long he's around, I will never get used to that."

Vegeta glanced at him. "To what?"

"The way his voice echoes."

Bulma shook her head. "That's nothing. He asked me to check his blood rune on the inside of his armor. He had to take his head off."

Chibi Trunks gaped. "Wow..."

00000000000000000000000000000000

Al poked his head into his brother's room. Sure enough, Ed was still asleep, tangled up in the sheets. Al sighed and shook his head. Ed would never change.

He walked over to the bedside. "Nii-san, it's time to get up," he said softly, shaking the other.

Ed just kept snoring away.

Al sighed again. "Nii-san..." he repeated, louder this time, "it's time to get up."

No response.

"Ed, you're going to miss breakfast!"

"Nng... Five more minutes, Al... Waiaminute, AL!" Ed yelped, bolting upright.

He stared at his little brother, gaping like a fish. "A—Al?" He panicked. "Whatareyoudoingherehowdidyougetheredidyougothroughthetransmitterweweren'tdonewithtestsyoucouldhavebeenkilledyourbloodrunecouldhavebeenwrecked!" Ed's expression said clearly that he was horrified and could continue in this vein for hours.

Al held up his hands to quiet his brother. "Nii-san, calm down! I'm fine!"

"Butbutbut—!"

"I'm fine! Anyway, Bulma knew you weren't gong to let me cross without doing more tests, and she also knew that no matter how many test we did, you'd always want to do another, so she sent you do bed, ran a few more tests on blood and such, and then sent me. I was in the library all last night." He put his hands down, seeing his brother was quiet. "And you _are_ late for breakfast, nii-san."

Ed's eyes widened. "Food!" He bolted out of bed, tripped over the sheets, untangled himself, and dashed into the bathroom. "Tell them I'll be right down!"

Al sighed and walked out of the room, closing the door behind him. He walked back down to the kitchen, where Vegeta and the Trunkses were _still_ eating.

Bulma looked up. "Where's Ed?"

"Getting dressed."

Bulma nodded. "So he's up, then. Good."

"Well, it took me three tries to get him to respond at all. Then it took five minutes to get him to stop overreacting and explain."

Chibi Trunks snickered.

"What's so funny?" Ed yawned, walking in.

"Nii-san, you're falling asleep on your feet again."

Ed just blinked at him. Then he noticed the food.

Enough said.

00000000000000000000000000000000

A few days later, Goten and Trunks came home from a fair. Thew were loaded down with all sorts of prizes. (Hey, they're part Saiyan. And kids. You can't really expect anything less, can you?)

They each took their own new toys home. When Goten got to his house, he dumped most of the stuff in his room, took the last one and raced off to find his mom. "Mom!HeyMom,look!LookwhatIwonatthefairwithTrunks!" he babbled, holding up a goldfish in a plastic bag. Chi-Chi looked down, saw the fish, and blanched, remembering all the other animals Goten'd brought home.

"CanIkeephim?Please?Please?Pleeeeeeease?" Goten pleaded, unconsciously employing the Puppy Eyes™.

Chi-Chi, however, wasn't sure. "Well..."

"Pleeeeeeeeeeease?"

"I don't think so..."

Goten upgraded to Watery Puppy Eyes™. "But Mom!"

"..." Chi-Chi looked at her youngest son. She didn't want to keep the fish, but she also didn't want her chibi to start crying.

Luckily for her, Gohan walked in. He took one look at the fish and grinned. "Why don't you lett him, Mom. I have an idea..."

00000000000000000000000000000000

Later that day, Gohan brought Goten and his fish to Capsule Corp to talk to Bulma. The first person they ran into, though, was Al.

Gohan stared at the suit of armor. "I've seen you before, haven't I...?"

Goten just gaped. "Wow..."

Al turned to look at Gohan. "...You're Gohan, right?"

Gohan nodded.

"I'm Al. Ed's my big brother."

"Oh! Now I remember! Sorry," Gohan apologized, giving Al a sheepish Son Grin™. "By the way, do you know where Bulma is?"

Al nodded. "Yeah. She's in the transmit room."

"Thanks."

"You're welcome. Have you seen nii-san?"

Gohan shook his head. "Sorry. I just got here."

"Oh. Thanks anyway."

"See you!"

"Bye, Gohan!" Al waved and walked off in search of his nii-san.

Gohan waved back, grabbed the back of Goten's gi (he'd been trying to sneak away) and left for the transmit room.

00000000000000000000000000000000

Neat, huh? Okay, who can guess what Gohan's planning? Cookies to anyone who gets it right! And please leave me a review on your way out.


	11. MR BUBBLES!

**Summary:** A mysterious stranger takes Edward Elric and deposits him in the DBZ world.

**Disclaimer:** (BritKit, it walks alone, Mordecai, Friend 1 and Friend 2 are sitting at a table)

Friend 1: (glare)

BritKit: (shrinks away)

Friend 1: Write the disclaimer already! I'll be right back. (leaves, dragging Friend 2 with her)

Friend 2: (realizes she is moving) Um.

All: (sweatdrop)

it walks alone: Methinks I am going to steal a dumdum.

Mordecai: Methinks I don't think.

IWA: Therefore you do not exist.

M: ...You're right! I don't!

Friend 1: (comes back) The wall jumped out and bit me!

Friend 2: It did! I witnessed it!

BK: Riiight.

M: (notices F2's binder) Hey it's a carebear! I have lots of carebears...

BK: o.o

IWA: O.o

BK: Movingon... (points to F1 and F2) You two need names.

F1: OK! Hmm... Howzabout FC?

IWA: What's it stand for?

M: freakinCRAZY!

freakinCRAZY: Perfect!

F2: What about me?

M: ...flyonthewall!

flyonthewall: ...Eh OK.

FC: (sings) I'm a fly on the wall, watching everything go by!

All except FC: o.O ...

FC: I like it! Muwah!

All: ...

FTW: That's gonna be my theme song!

FC: (sings louder) I'm a fly on the wall, watching everything go by... Zippity do dah! Zippity—

WHACK

FC: (dies)

IWA: (pets binder)

BK: ...Not gonna ask...

M: How do I Internet?

All: o.O

FC: (comes back to life) Rootbeer!

IWA: Whoopde freakin' wee-hah.

M: Ya know there's no time in space? Geometrically speaking, there's no timeframe based on the Sun.

All: ... (sweatdrop)

FTW: What if you were on the Sun?

M: You can't _be_ on the Sun. You'd die.

FC: I gotta try that!

FC: I'm gonna go online and search for a one-way ticket to the Sun 'cause I won't be comin' back!

FTW: They're probably selling those on e-bay...

FC: Aflack.

BK: ON TO THE WHOLE POINT OF THIS THING!

IWA: Eh? Ohyeah... I don't own DBZ or FMA.

FC: What's FMA?

M: It's a proclamation that every word with a 'th' must be pronounced with an 'f'. Like Earf!

BK: (shoves M, FC, and FTW out of room) Do your stuff, IWA.

IWA: Right.

**Review Responses:**

**Vyrexuviel:** O.o ...Should I even listen to you?

**WildfireDreams:** Thank you!

**SeaLover456:** Well, not the part about dropping it down his coat... (cackles evilly) No, it's much more fun than that...

**hellfire014:** Yessir.

**Firehedgehog:** (grins back)

**Suuki-Aldrea:** O.o Are all your alternate personalities that violent?

"Speaking" _Thoughts _(Me to you) _"Telephone or other such communication device"_

**Last time:**

Gohan waved back, grabbed the back of Goten's gi (he'd been trying to sneak away) and left for the transmit room.

**Chapter 11: MR. BUBBLES!**

Ed and Al were walking through Capsule Corp, comparing notes and viewpoints on what happened over the past few weeks. They turned a corner.

"—AAAAAAHHHHHH!"

Ed yelped and clapped his hands over his ears.

Someone was wailing. Obviously.

The two brothers, against all good judgment, continued down the hall. The infernal noise appeared to be coming from a room.

"Nii-san, isn't that the transmit room?"

Ed checked. "Yup." He reached over and opened the door. (Stupid Edo-kun!)

He immediately covered his ears and cringed.

Al stared into the room and started vibrating.

Goten was sitting in the middle of the floor, screaming, with waterfalls coming out of his eyes. Bulma was alternating between messing around with the machinery and yelling (or trying to) at Goten. Gohan was standing off to the side with his hands over his ears in a constant cringe. There was also a yellow goldfish on the transmit table in a plastic bag swimming around in circles.

Gohan noticed them and gestured (with his elbows, as his hands were busy plugging his ears) to the door. He walked around the growing puddle in the middle of the floor, through the door, and waited for the Elric brothers. Once they had come through the door, he closed it and led them down the hall. They turned the corner.

The wailing was suddenly cut off. Gohan sighed in relief and uncovered his aching ears.

"Sorry about Goten. He brought a goldfish home from the fair, and I suggested we use it to try sending something living between universes, and, well, he isn't taking it too well..."

Ed snorted. "Now _that's_ an understatement."

Gohan winced. "Sorry. Anything else before we go deafen ourselves again?"

"Yeah. What happened to the sound?"

"Well, since people have been screaming a lot in there, Bulma invented a sound dampener. She set it up so that once you go around the corner, you can't hear anything."

"Thank God," Ed replied.

"Uhh... You really don't want to do that," Gohan advised nervously.

"Huh? Why?" Al asked, confused.

"Dende likes to torture people he knows. Aka, me."

"Oooohh."

"Yeah. Anything else?"

"No."

"Right. Let's go deafen ourselves again."

They all sighed. Ed and Gohan covered their ears, and then they all trooped back to the transmit room, wincing periodically.

They walked into the transmit room, and were immediately bombarded by Goten's (now intelligible) screaming.

"IT'S MY FISH IT'S MINEEEEE! WAAAAAHHHHH!"

Bulma, getting fed up with Goten's wailing, sent the fish through.

Goten immediately stopped crying and stared at the transmit table.

He sniffled.

His eyes started to water.

Gohan groaned. "Oh no..."

A few seconds later, Goten's eyes filled with tears.

"WAAAHHH MY FISHY'S GONE WAAAHHH!"

"I'm surprised something hasn't shattered yet," Ed muttered.

00000000000000000000000000000000

Colonel Mustang was in his office sitting behind his (third—STILL!) desk, doing some paperwork, and reveling in the peace and quiet.

/plop/

He looked up. Sitting on top of his paper was a goldfish in a plastic bag, swimming in the fastest circles Mustang had ever seen.

There was a /ping/ and the TV came on.

"—AAAAHHH I WAN MY FISHY BACK AAHHHH!"

Mustang jumped.

First Lieutenant Hawkeye burst through the door, guns blazing.

Mustang ducked.

"_WOULD SOMEONE SHUT HIM UP!"_

On the screen, Ed leaped across the room, tackled Goten, and smacked his left hand over said chibi's mouth.

The screams are mercifully muffled.

"_Thank you, Ed,"_ Bulma sighed.

"_No problem,"_ the blond replied.

Bulma turned to the TV screen, looking haggard. _"Did the fish—"_

Goten pried Ed's hand off his mouth. _"MR. BUBBLES!"_

Ed re-clamped Goten's mouth shut.

"_FINE! Did MR. BUBBLES get through alright?"_

Mustang came out from behind a bookshelf. "He is unless Hawkeye shot him, but he was swimming in some of the fastest circles I've ever seen."

Riza was staring at the desk. "Umm... I didn't shoot the fish... but your desk is... uhh... sorta... totaled..."

Everyone turned.

The fish was frozen in its plastic bag on the only part of the Colonel's desk that didn't resemble Swiss cheese.

Mustang's eyes widened. "NOOOO MY DESK!"

Goten finally managed to pry Ed's hand off of his mouth again. _"I WANNA SEE MR.—"_ Ed's auto-mail cut him off.

"I'm sorry, sir," Riza apologized.

Mustang was hugging what was left of his desk. "I had just gotten it organized..."

"The fish—" Riza began.

"_MR. BUBBLES!"_ Goten yelled. Ed smacked his hand over the chibi's mouth yet again.

Riza twitched. "...Mr. Bubbles..." she shuddered, "appears to be alright..." she poked the bag and the fish started swimming in circles again, "...but he looks like he's on speed..."

Bulma frowned. _"Well, I don't want to risk sending him twice. It might be shock. Keep him for a few days and if he doesn't get better, call a vet. We'll be in touch."_

/click/

"Hawkeye."

Riza gulped. "Yessir."

"Your next assignment is to buy me a new desk, organize it, and get _all_ my notes copied AND NO PAY FOR THIS!"

"Yessir."

"And _next_ time, _check_ before you start shooting."

00000000000000000000000000000000

Later that day, they were all in the kitchen. Bulma was leaning against a counter, Gohan was leaning on the table, Ed was sitting at said table with his head resting on it, and Goten was also sitting at the table with a very very 'lost little puppy' look on his face, his eyes were red, and he was staring forward aimlessly. Vegeta and Al were MIA.

Chi-Chi came in and saw Goten. Her eyebrow shot up. "Okay, what happened?"

Goten's eyes started watering. He sniffled.

Everyone (except Chi-Chi) groaned. "Oh HELL no."

Goten started bawling. "THEYTOOKMRBUBBLESANDSENT'IMTOAL'SWORLDAN'THEYWON'SENDHIMBAA-ACK! WAAAAAHHHH!"

Everyone winced.

Ed started banging his head against the table.

Gohan and Bulma put their hands over their ears.

Chi-Chi did likewise.

Al vibrated past the door.

00000000000000000000000000000000

Five minutes later:

"AAAAHHHHHH! I WANT MR. BUBBLES BAAACK!"

Ed leaped up and grabbed the front of Chi-Chi's top, begging. "MAKE HIM STOP!"

Al vibrated past the door in the other direction.

"Alright, THAT'S ENOUGH!" Chi-Chi yelled. She reached into a pocket and took out a roll of duct tape.

/rrrrk RIP/

/SMACK/

Goten blinked: there was a large piece of duct tape over his mouth.

/RIPRIPRIPRIPRIPRIP/

/tapetapetapetapetape/

A few seconds later, Goten had a half inch thick WALL of duct tape covering the lower half of his face.

"There. That should hold for a few hours," Chi-Chi proclaimed, satisfied.

/CLANG/

"Ow..." Al's voice echoed down the hallway. "Has he stopped yet?"

"Yes, thank DENDE. What _is_ that stuff?" Ed replied, massaging his aching forehead.

"Duct tape," Chi-Chi answered. "Capable of holding the universe together."

"And my sanity," Ed muttered.

"I gotta get some of that..." Bulma plotted.

00000000000000000000000000000000

Whoo-hoo! Funny, ne? Well, please let me know what you think. And please leave me a review on your way out.


	12. 50 Review Special!

**Summary:** A mysterious stranger takes Edward Elric and deposits him in the DBZ world.

it walks alone: Hey! It's me again.

BritKit: Obviously.

IWA: Be quiet, you. Anywho, this is a side story on my fanfic Alchemy and Saiyans.

BK: It's not part of the actual storyline. It's the **50 Review Special!**

IWA: So yes, as you have probably figured out by now, I have received 50 reviews! (does happy dance)

BK: (watches IWA) ...Moving on. This is an absolutely hilarious story that occurs at Capsule Corp in the morning.

IWA: (stops doing happy dance) Ergo, Edo-kun is dead to the world.

BK: (sweatdrops) Ergo? Uhh... Translation, please?

IWA: Oh, sorry. It means therefore.

BK: Is that actually English?

IWA: Believe it or not, yes.

BK: o.o Wow...

IWA: Yes, I actually pay attention in English class.

BK: o.O

IWA: What's _that _look for?

BK: You... PAY ATTENTION. That's, like, treason, or something!

IWA: O.o What?

BK: O.O Nevermind.

IWA: ...Riiight. Moving on... (nudges BritKit)

BK: Oh right! Neither of us owns DBZ or FMA.

IWA: Somebody tell me if they're selling Edo-kun.

BK: (ignores IWA) And this story has no plot.

IWA: Well, almost. You wrote a plot sheet for it, so it has to have SOME.

BK: ...I hate you.

IWA: (snickers)

BK: Shut up!

IWA: (keeps snickering) Why should I?

BK: Because I am your muse and beta and—

IWA: Well, I'm kind of my own beta...

BK: SHUT UP! And I can stop writing your plots!

IWA: O.O Shutting up.

BK: ...You've been watching A Bug's Life again, haven't you?

IWA: ...Reviews!

**Vyrexuviel:** Should I call the cruelty to animals people...?

**WildfireDreams:** I know, isn't it?

**Sasha Rin:** Well, my muse writes the plot...

BK: Thank me!

IWA: Just ignore her...

BK: I HEARD THAT!

IWA: Of course you did.

**Suuki-Aldrea:** Oh. Well, I seem to have many personalities, but the only online one is almost always hyper...

00000000000000000000000000000000

A/N: Since my muse hasn't written me my next disclaimer, you get this instead. Well, I _did_ get 50 reviews, but I was planning to post the next chapter before this so I wouldn't have to split the Fish arc in two. Oh well. And before you ask, I wrote this disclaimer, and the feedback I've gotten on it is that it's not quite as funny or insane as the others that BritKit wrote, but if that's the truth, DEAL WITH IT. It's not changing.

00000000000000000000000000000000

BK: Whoopde freakin' wee-hah.

IWA: Hey! That's my line!

"Speaking" _Thoughts _(Me to you) _"Telephone or other such communication device"_

**ON TO THE STORY...**

The Time: Eh... Morning.

The Place: Capsule Corp. Obviously.

What's Happening: The Brats. Enough said.

One early morning in Capsule Corporation in West City, DBZ world, Trunks and Goten, collectively known as the Brats (or more formally the Demon Brats, but Brats is shorter and easier to scream at the top of your lungs), could be seen (provided one was in the area and looking in the correct direction, of course) sneaking into Vegeta's room. (Bulma had gotten up already to start breakfast.)

Five minutes later, they could be seen (again, provided one was watching) sneaking back out. The two tiptoed down the hall. As soon as they turned the corner, they took off, literally. They flew until they had reached the outside door.

Trunks snickered. "5... 4..."

"Trunks, why are you counting?" Goten asked cluelessly.

Trunks glared at him. "... 3... 2... 1..."

"BRAAAAAAATS!"

"RUN!"

The two chibis bolted out the doors, Vegeta following soon after.

"GET BACK HERE!"

The three of them started flying in circles around the outside of Capsule Corp's maze of a residential wing.

00000000000000000000000000000000

Videl was in the Capsule Corp store buying capsules (Obviously!) for her father. She finished, paid, and left, putting her money away (and not watching where she was going). Once she got outside, however, she ran into what felt like a brick wall.

"Ouch!" she yelped, falling back and landing on her butt.

"Huh? Oh! Sorry, Videl, I didn't see you there," Gohan said, bending down to help her up. "Why are you here?"

Videl glared at him, holding her forehead (which was what had run into him). "I could ask you the same question. I was buying some capsules for my dad. And you?"

Gohan shrugged. "Well, I was going to pick up Goten from Capsule." He grimaced. "I hope he hasn't pranked anyone..." (Hah! You wish! He wouldn't be a Brat if he didn't prank anyone!)

Videl stared at him. "Goten? As in your little brother? WHY WOULD HE BE AT CAPSULE CORP!"

Gohan winced. "Not so loud, please? Anyway, Bulma's a family friend and—"

"FAMILY FRIEND!"

Gohan winced again. "Look, how about we go somewhere a little more private? People are starting to stare."

Videl looked around. Sure enough, people were staring at them. "Y-yeah. Let's do that. Where?"

Gohan glanced around. "Uhh... How about behind the store?"

Videl nodded and followed him around to the back of the store.

"Now, what's this about THE Bulma Briefs being a family friend of yours?" she demanded, leveling her best glare on him. Gohan cringed slightly.

"Well, she knew my dad when they were growing up... I don't really know much else," he said, shrugging.

Videl continued to glare at him.

"I'm serious!"

"Okay. Enough about that. You know your way around Capsule Corp, don't you? Do you think you could give me a tour, or something?"

Gohan gulped. "Uhh..."

"C'mon, Gohan."

Gohan sighed. "Fine. But I'm warning you right now, we may encounter some very odd things."

"Such as?"

"Flying chibis and Bulma with a Frying Pan."

00000000000000000000000000000000

So, Gohan and Videl were walking (Ooo, romance!) to the Capsule Corp residential wing so Gohan could ask Bulma if it was okay to give Videl a tour when he sensed it. Or rather, them.

He froze. "Uhh... Videl?"

"Yeah?" she asked, turning to look at him.

"Get against the wall. Please."

Videl stared at him. "Wha...? Why?"

"Please, just do it. You'll find out why in a minute, when the reasons show up."

Videl was still staring at him as if he was some sort of crazy, but she obeyed. (Good thing she did, too.)

Almost as soon as she did so, two figures literally flew around the corner of the building. And both were headed right for Gohan.

Gohan raised his hands.

/Whamwham/

Gohan jerked back. In his hands were Trunks' and Goten's heads.

"Okay, Brats. What'd you do this time?"

"Well,weprankedVegeta—"

"—Andnowhe'smadatus—"

"—Andfollowingus—"

"—Andhe'sgonnakillus!" the two chibis in Gohan's hands wailed at hyperspeed.

Gohan rolled his eyes. "And why am I not surprised?"

Videl gaped. "You can understand them?"

"One of them's my little brother. I'm used to it."

"Oh." She gulped.

Then Vegeta rocketed around the corner, managed to spot Gohan and the Brats, and screeched to a halt before he could hit said demi-Saiyans.

"So, Vegeta, what'd th—" Gohan cut himself off, noticing Vegeta's appearance.

Gohan stared.

Then he started snickering.

Finally, he couldn't hold it anymore, and burst out laughing.

Vegeta growled. "Kakkabrat... Shut. Up!"

The reason Gohan was laughing like a maniac: Vegeta's hair.

It had been dyed.

And it wasn't just any color.

It was BUBBLEGUM PINK.

(IWA: (falls over laughing) BK: (glare) IWA: (continues laughing) BK: (CONTINUE THE STORY ALREADY!) IWA: O.O Meep. Yes ma'am.)

Vegeta Death-Glared™ at Gohan.

Gohan, however, couldn't stop laughing.

Vegeta's Death-Glare™ upgraded to the Glare-Of-Imminent-Doom-Or-Perhaps-Intense-Pain-Which-Would-Be-Worse™. (IWA: I made it up!)

Gohan shut up.

The two chibis looked up at the eldest demi-Saiyan, took in his pale face, and gulped.

Gohan found his voice. "Ohcrap..."

There was a moment of silence.

"RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!"

Gohan and the two chibis turned and bolted, nearly knocking Videl over in their haste to remove themselves from Vegeta's general vicinity.

Vegeta _did_ knock her over when he took off after them, yelling, "GET BACK HERE, YOU -censored-!"

Soon, the four of them were circling Capsule Corp. Again, for three of them.

After they had done a few circuits around the residential wing, Bulma walked out the door and noticed Videl.

"Hello, and what are you doing here?" the blue-haired genius asked.

Videl turned, unable to get her voicebox to produce any sounds that could with any stretch of the imagination be called words, and pointed, just as the four Saiyans blew past yet again.

Bulma nodded in understanding. "Oh. I was wondering why no one showed up for breakfast."

Videl finally found her voice again. "Stop them! Please!" she begged.

"Sure." Shrugging, Bulma walked to where Gohan had been standing and took out four Frying Pans. Three she held in her left hand, one in her right.

"Brace yourself," she advised Videl as the four blurs jetted aroung the corner yet again.

/Whamwham Wham/

/CLANG/

/thudthudthudthud/

Vegeta rubbed his now-incredibly-sore head. "Goddammit you -censo— -"

/CLANG/

"Now," Bulma said calmly, as if she hadn't just whacked her husband on the head with a Frying Pan. Twice. "We are going to sit down and discuss this like civilized human beings. Er... Saiyans."

Vegeta growled. "To hell with—"

/CLANG/

Needless to say, Videl was frightened out of her wits.

00000000000000000000000000000000

Five minutes later, Vegeta, Trunks, Goten, and Gohan were tied (with Saiyanproof ropes) to chairs (also Saiyanproof, of course) inside.

"So," Bulma said, sitting down, "let's discuss this. What, _exactly_, happened?"

Vegeta glared at the Brats. "They dyed my hair, dammit!"

"Watch it, mister."

Vegeta subsided, growling.

Bulma turned to the Brats. "So, you pranked Vegeta. I gotta say, that was a good one."

"Onna..." Vegeta growled menacingly.

/Clang/

"But that doesn't mean I'm not gonna punish you two. At least Trunks. You, young man, will be stuck with Vegeta in the GR until he's back to normal."

Trunks gulped.

"And you're on half-rations."

Said chibi's eyes bugged out. He gaped, but wisely said nothing.

"You," she said, turning to Goten, "I'm going to turn over directly to Chi-Chi."

Goten nodded, sullen.

She turned to Vegeta. "And you, buster, are sleeping on the couch for a week."

Vegeta 'hmph-ed' and turned away.

"Now, Gohan, what was your part in all this?"

"Well, I was going to ask you if I could give Videl a tour—she asked me (well, blackmailed me, really)—when I sensed the Brats headed around the corner. So I got Videl out of the way, caught the two little demons, and asked what was going on. All I got was Bratbabble. Then Vegeta showed up chasing them, and I accidentally laughed at him, so he started chasing me as well."

Bulma blinked. "Really?" she asked, turning to Videl, who nodded affirmation.

"Well, then, you get one Frying Pan on the head for laughing at Veggie!" Bulma concluded happily.

/Clang/

Gohan grimaced, but didn't complain. He knew it could have been worse. Much worse.

The Brats had the 'worse'.

And Vegeta's hair was still PINK.

Poor Trunks.

00000000000000000000000000000000

IWA: (cackles madly like a deranged idiot)

BK: (whacks IWA) Come on, it's not that funny.

IWA: (still laughing) Yes it is!

BK: o.o ... You're hyper again, aren't you?

IWA: (suddenly very serious) ... (blinks at BK, wide-eyed) You just noticed?

BK: (glare) No. I just decided to mention it for the first time.

IWA: (relieved) Good. I'd be scared if you hadn't noticed.

BK: (glares some more) Gods, you're hyper...

IWA: (suddenly very chipper) And proud of it!

BK: (rolls eyes) Anyway...

BK & IWA: Review!


	13. Enter the—HISSSS!

**Summary:** A mysterious stranger takes Edward Elric and deposits him in the DBZ world.

**Disclaimer:**

it walks alone: (scribble scribble)

freakinCRAZY: (sneaks up behind IWA) (pokes IWA in side)

IWA: YAAAH!

FC: (runs)

IWA: (leaps up) (runs after FC) (downward hammerfists FC) I swear, the next time you do that I WILL kill you. (mutters)

BritKit: (scribbles) El... articulo... little dash thing... article...

Mordecai: I smell fire... Do you think we should run?

BK, IWA, & FC: (ignore)

BK: La... edicion... dash... edition...

M: My fro's name is Delroy!

IWA: That's nice. (scribble)

BK: El... escritor... dash... writer...

FC: Spanish homework?

BK: Yup.

FC: Due last period?

BK: Yup.

FC: Nice.

BK: Myup.

M: (spins quarter) Jesus is like 10 leprechauns, but he's a lot harder to catch.

IWA: (looks at M weird)

M: So what about that pep rally on Friday? Supposedly we have to bring pep.

FC: ...

IWA: ...

BK: Morir... parenthesis o dash ue comma u parenthesis... to die...

FC: That's real nice.

IWA: It is, isn't it.

BK: La... tira... comica... dashthingy... comic strip...

FC: I think she's ignoring us.

IWA: (ties pink bows in M's hair) No, really?

M: You know you've been in chem too long when you start wondering about the percent composition of that crumb. (points to crumb)

IWA: Whatever you say, Mordecai. (pats M on head)

FC: (waves hand in front of BK's eyes)

BK: El... anuncio... stop that freakinCRAZY... dashthingamabob... commercial...

FC: (sweatdrop)

M: (sings) Electrical tape electrical tape!

IWA: (in middle of next chapter) That's nice dear. (scribble scribble)

BK: Upside down question mark... de... veras... regular question mark... dash thing... really... question mark...

FC: I give up. IWA doesn't own FMA, DBZ, or much anything else of worth.

IWA: HEY!

FC: (very quickly) Sodon'tbothersuingbye! (runs)

IWA: (chases) Comebackhereyoulittle...!

BK: (totally oblivious) Upside down exclamation point... no... me... digas... regular exclamation point... dash-ish-thing... don't... tell... me... exclamation point...

**Review Responses:**

**Vyrexuviel:** Wheeeeee!

**SeaLover456:** Well, here's the update!

**WildfireDreams:** Thank you! Again!

**SK Lunar:** O.O Wow... And to think it originally wasn't supposed to be funny...

**MarshmellowDragon:** Well, as for your first idea, thank you! Useful!

**Suuki-Aldrea:** Thank you!

IWA: Now. What was I going to say again? Oh yeah! This is the second-to-last chapter of Alchemy and Saiyans. (hides from furious readers) Wait! Don't kill me yet! There will be a sequel! As a matter of fact, I've already started writing it! But yes, Chapter 13 will be the end of this story. Oooh, unlucky! (I just noticed that!)

"Speaking" _Thoughts _(Me to you) _"Telephone or other such communication device"_

**Last time:**

"Duct tape," Chi-Chi answered. "Capable of holding the universe together."

"And my sanity," Ed muttered.

"I gotta get some of that..." Bulma plotted.

**Chapter 12: Enter the—HISSSS!**

A few days later:

Bulma, Gohan, Mirai, Goten, Chibi Trunks, Al, and Ed were in the transmit room.

The 'cereal incident crew', aka Mustang, Riza, Hughes, Armstrong, and Havoc were on the screen.

"_The fish—"_ Riza began.

"MR. BUBBLES!"

Riza shuddered.

"_Mr. Bubbles appears to be recovering, so we think it's safe to send him back,"_ Hughes finished.

Goten sniffled. "Is he really okay?"

Hughes smiled. _"Yup."_ He held up the plastic bag with the fish in it. _"I took 'im to my house for a few days. My daughter loved it!"_

"_Just send the damn thing already,"_ Mustang growled.

Hughes inched away from him as he put the bag on the desk.

/bloop/

/plop/

/SNAP/

"NOOOO MR. BUBBLES!"

Mr. Bubbles' bag had landed on the edge of the transmit table, rolled off, fallen to the floor, and broken.

"FIND A BOWL!" Mirai yelled.

Everyone zoomed off in search of a fishbowl.

Goten started sniffling.

00000000000000000000000000000000

Gohan, zooming around Capsule Corp, ran into Vegeta. Almost literally.

Before he couldfly off again, Vegeta grabbed his arm. "What the hell is going on?"

Gohan explained.

"Why do I care if that fish lives or dies?"

"D'you want Goten to start wailing again?"

Vegeta paused. "Point." He turned and took off as well.

He shot into the kitchen, grabbed a mixing bowl, filled it with water, and zoomed to the transmit room.

Goten was still standing there, staring at his fish with watery eyes.

/flop flop gasp choke/

Vegeta shoved Goten out of the way, picked up the fish by the tail, and dropped it in the bowl.

/gasp choke BREATHE/

Goten turned to Vegeta with sparkles in his eyes. "You saved Mr. Bubbles!"

He immediately latched onto Vegeta.

Vegeta twitched.

Everyone else came in and stopped short at the sight before them.

Vegeta turned and pointed at Mirai. "You. Go. Buy. Fish. Tank. NOW."

Mirai gulped and nodded vigorously.

00000000000000000000000000000000

3 Days Later:

Vegeta, Bulma, and Mirai were in the kitchen arguing over who knows what. (I certainly don't! Ask my muse. But then, it's not important.)

Chibi Trunks bounded into the room, excited. "Hey, Mom! LookitwhatIfound!" he babbled, holding up a hissing garden snake by the tail.

Mirai blinked.

Bulma stared at the snake, wide-eyed.

Vegeta sweatdropped.

C Trunks grinned.

"AAAAAAAHHHH!" Bulma screamed, climbing Vegeta.

"...Being strangled..." Vegeta said in a normal voice.

"I didn't know Mom was afraid of snakes... I can _so_ exploit this.." Mirai grinned evilly.

"AIIIIIT'SASNAKE!"

"...STILL being strangled..."

"Eh? Oh, sorry, Dad."

Mirai took the snake from Chibi Trunks, who was rolling on the ground laughing at his parents' antics. He brought it to the transmit room, put it on the table and slammed a glass container over it when it tried to escape. "It's contained, Mom."

"OH THANK DENDE!"

Vegeta tried to catch his breath.

"Hey! I wanted to keep him!" C Trunks whined.

"Absolutely _NOT!_"

Trunks and Bulma then proceeded to start arguing, much to the amusement of Mirai and Vegeta. (Who was still trying to catch his breath. Hmm. Must be sneaky.)

00000000000000000000000000000000

Later:

Mustang walked into his office and inspected his new desk. (Courtesy of First Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye.) He sat down and started checking the drawers.

HISSSS!

Mustang immediately slammed the drawer shut.

"..."

"HAWKEYE!"

00000000000000000000000000000000

Across the building, Riza was getting some papers for Mustang.

"HAWKEYE!"

"Oh great." She turned back to the nameless officer. "Thanks."

She walked back over to the Colonel's office, opened the door slowly, and poked her head in. "...Sir?"

Mustang gave her a death glare. "Riza..." he said calmly.

Riza gulped. "Yessir?"

"Would you like to explain WHY THERE IS A SNAKE IN MY DESK!"

Riza stared. "Umm... I don't know?"

Mustang growled at her.

/ping/

"_NO NO NO and NO!"_ Bulma screamed.

"_He's MINE I brought him home and I wanna keep him!"_ C Trunks yelled back.

Mirai turned to the screen, sweatdropping. _"Um, you wouldn't happen to have a garden snake in there by any chance, would you?"_

Mustang turned to glare at Mirai and opened The Drawer.

HISSSS!

Mustang slammed The Drawer shut.

Mirai smiled, relieved. _"Oh, wonderful. Is it alright?"_

Riza reached over, pried Mustang's hand off The Drawer, (which was second from the top on the left side, by the way) took the snake, and inspected it. "It seems to be. I think I'll set this one free."

"_THANK YOU!" _Bulma yelled from her perch atop Vegeta, who was standing there glaring at anyone and anything.

C Trunks pouted. _"But I wanna keep him..."_

00000000000000000000000000000000

Wheeee! Another Mr. Bubbles! Well, at least this one wasn't named. Just a warning—the next and final chapter will be very short. Yes, it's already written. But my rule about reviews still stands. Please leave me a review on your way out.


	14. Finale

**Summary:** A mysterious stranger takes Edward Elric and deposits him in the DBZ world.

**Disclaimer:** This is a 2-parter. So if you've forgotten the previousdisclaimer, go back and read it.

it walks alone: (comes back with very satisfied look on her face)

freakinCRAZY: (walking after her) (collapse) gasp choke die

IWA: (sits down)

BritKit: Upside down question mark... tu... crees... question mark... dash... do... you... think... so... question mark...

IWA: Are you _still_ doing Spanish homework?

BK: Upside down exclamation point... yup... crap!

IWA: What?

BK: (erases madly) I wrote "yup" instead of "Yo lo se"...

IWA: ...Uh-huh.

Mordecai: You know we have Monday off after break?

BK: (still erasing) Whoopde freakin wee-hah.

IWA: Hey that's my line!

BK: (scribble scribble) Upside down exclamation point... yo... lo... se... exclamation point... I'm sorry, what was that?

IWA: -.- Nevermind.

BK: Eh, okay... de... repente... dashthing... suddenly...

IWA: (sigh)

FC: (BELCH) (stands up) I feel much better!

IWA: I thought you were dead.

FC: NOPE! WhadidImiss? Huhhuhhuhhuhhuh?

IWA: o.o I'm scared.

M: (shocked look) I forgot!

IWA: Forgot what?

FC: (stops bouncing)

M: Target sells kosher Pepsi! They use kosher sugar in it!

BK: (starts listening at the wrong moment) Wait... What the HELL?

M: People sell it on EBAY!

BK: (goes back to homework) People sell everything on ebay.

FC: Including tickets to the Sun!

IWA: (getting hyper) _One-way_ tickets to the Sun!

BK: El... heroe... dashything... hero...

M: Hurricane. Force winds!

IWA: Weeeeeeeeehehehehehehehehe!

M: Back to the news!

IWA: (bounces)

M: Mmm carrots.

BK: El... slash... la... ladron parenthesisonaparenthesis... dashthinger... thief...

FC: Are you accusing me of being a THIEF?

BK: ...Rescate... dasherthing... to... rescue... HAH! Done! (looks up to see IWA bouncing off walls, M hyperbabbling, and FC competing with herself as to how loud she can burp) ... ...Right then. I guess it's up to me.

IWA: (Bouncebouncebounce)

BK: IWA does not own FMA or DBZ and never will. Which brings me to my point!

IWA: (Bouncebouncebounce)

BK: If life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it!

**Review Responses:**

**Vyrexuviel:** (growls) You aren't afraid of snakes, are you, brother?

**WildfireDreams:** Thank you! (glomps)

**Some Lazy Baka:** Thankyouthankyouthankyou! (glomps as well, not having let go of WildfireDreams yet) Nice name, too.

**Suuki-Aldrea:** Updating, faithful reviewer!

IWA: (lets go of the suffocating reviewers) Yes, this is the finale, as you can tell by the chapter title, if you've bothered to check. It's also very short. The only way I could've make it longer would have been to drag it on and make it boring. At least to me, anyway. If you want to know when I post the sequel, you'll just have to put me on your "Author Alert" list, because I'm not gonna tell you the title! Nyah! Wait, does that make any difference? Or any sense?

IWA: Wow, the disclaimer and everything else is longer than the actual chapter! (gasps)

"Speaking" _Thoughts _(Me to you) _"Telephone or other such communication device"_

**Last time:**

"_THANK YOU!" _Bulma yelled from her perch atop Vegeta, who was standing there glaring at anyone and anything.

C Trunks pouted. _"But I wanna keep him..."_

**Chapter 13: Finale**

Sergeant Brosh was walking down a (random) hall in the military headquarters. He noticed the doors to Colonel Mustang's office. (So it _wasn't_ a _random_ hallway...) He was going to just pass by, but there were some very loud noises coming from in there, so he decided to check it out.

He opened the door a bit and stuck his head in.

He froze.

He backed away and closed the door.

"..."

"Lieutenant Colonel Hughes!" he yelled, running down the hall to said officer's, well, office.

On the way, he passed by the lounge.

He paused and leaned back to look through the open doorway.

Hughes, Mustang, Armstrong, and Riza were in the lounge, drinking tea/coffee/water/etc.

"Lieutenant Colonel Hughes!" Sergeant Brosh called. They all looked up. "...Colonel Mustang? COLONEL MUSTANG! Your office is being overrun by animals!"

"I know," Mustang replied calmly, sipping his coffee.

"And they're every—wait, you KNOW?"

"Yes."

"..."

"The Z-Senshi sent the local zoo through and they're waiting for them to climb on my desk so they can take them back. I've been temporarily relocated here."

"Oh. Um... Okay?"

Mustang shrugged. "There's nothing I can do about it."

Hughes nodded. "Yeah. All we can do is hope the animals don't break his desk... again."

Mustang glowered. "They'd _better_ not. That's my FOURTH DESK!"

Armstrong and Riza nodded serenely.

Sergeant Brosh looked very scared.

00000000000000000000000000000000

A few days later, Mustang went back to his office to check and see if the zoo was gone yet. He stopped outside the doors and listened, pressing one ear to the door.

There was silence.

Satisfied as to that point, Mustang cautiously opened the door and peeked in.

Ed was sitting on his desk, which was piled high with teetering towers of paper, rifling through some more which were piled on his lap. Al was sitting off to the side.

The elder Elric looked up, having heard the door open.

"Hey, Mustang. I'm back."

Mustang stared at his formerly-organized desk in despair. "So I've noticed."

Ed grinned.

"Fullmetal, get off my desk."

"Why?"

"Get OFF."

"Why?"

"I don't need ANOTHER one destroyed."

Ed was very confused. "Another? How many have you gone through?"

"That's my FOURTH DESK. Get OFF."

Ed's eyes widened. "Fourth? Really?"

"Yes. And Hawkeye had to buy it and organize it after she turned my LAST one into Swiss cheese."

Ed paled. "Oh shit! She's gonna kill me!"

"Yes, Fullmetal. IF she finds out. Put everything back the way you found it before she checks and she won't. I wont say anything."

Ed started to shove papers into random drawers.

Mustang rolled his eyes.

"Fullmetal."

Ed stopped and looke up.

"She WILL check. Organize it."

The rest of the color in Ed's face drained away.

"Oh crap..."

Mustang smirked, turned, and left Edward Elric, the Fullmetal Alchemist, to his fate, just as First Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye passed him on her way into his office.

Pause.

"EDWARD!"

Mustang's smirk grew as he walked down the hall.

00000000000000000000000000000000

It's finally done! I meant to add some sort of bad guy, but there was a perfect ending spot here, so any evil dude will be featuredin the sequel. It will be coming out sometime in the future, I promise, but since it's in the Hagaren world and I'm stuck learning about FMA through the manga since I don't have cable and can't watch anime (sobs), I'll be waiting to learn more about the Homunculi and the Hagren world in general before I post the next story. And yes, even though the first two chapters of the sequel are done, I won't be telling you the title, because that would give everything away.

P.S. - It will also have Alchemy and Saiyans-esk disclaimers, since BritKit will still be my muse, so if you've been looking forward to those, don't worry. (Vyrexuviel!)

Anywho, ja ne!

it walks alone


End file.
